


To Save the Stars and Control Time

by Covert_dragon97



Series: The Wolf and the Trickster [3]
Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Jessica Jones (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Bad Wolf, Compulsion, Episode: s04e12 The Stolen Earth, Episode: s04e13 Journey's End, F/M, Friendship, Past Relationship(s), Post-Avengers (2012), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Siblings, Slow Burn, building romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2019-07-28 13:50:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 29,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16242929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Covert_dragon97/pseuds/Covert_dragon97
Summary: Rose Tyler's adventures after the Battle of New York as she deals with awakening Bad Wolf and her feelings for the God of Mischief and the last of the Time Lords.





	1. Gone, but Not Forgotten

Every time I think my life couldn’t possibly get any worse, the Universe takes it as a challenge to prove me wrong. My life in this world may not have been ideal, but at least I was managing. Now, I’m part of a real team again, defending the Earth in ways I haven’t since my first Doctor; I have an all powerful life force living inside my head that I can barely control, and the one person in this world that might have been able to help me control it is gone.

Gone, but not forgotten.

Every night I dream of him, sometimes good, like how we met, of our talks together, of the night we shared after the battle. Most often, they were nightmares - of him pushing me into an endless void, of him dying in my arms, of him stabbing me through the chest... Tonight, however, was different than any of the dreams or nightmares I had had before.

I dream of an enormous elaborate hallway, golden pillars were everywhere, structurally placed to hold up the ceiling of the large area, my dream-self looking around in awe before setting my sights on a figure walking towards me. I’m not surprised to see him, the man who had haunted my dreams since the Battle of New York, the God of Mischief: Loki. His raven black hair fell to his shoulders, his handsome face a mask of his true emotions. His tall lean body covered by the green, black, and gold leather from when I’d last seen him, but with the addition of chains shackled around his wrists, ankles, and neck. 

“I really don’t see what all the fuss is about?” His smooth voice held the amusement it usually did, as if life was just full of jokes.

He was facing an ornate throne, positioned higher up at the top of a pedestal with a small stairway leading up to it. In the throne sat an older man, with white hair and beard, one eye covered by a leather eye-patch. He wore golden Asgardian armor, more regal than the typical soldier. His voice was deep, full of seriousness and disappointment. “Do you not truly feel the gravity of your crimes? Wherever you go there’s war, ruin, and death.”

“I went down to Midgard to rule the people of Earth as a benevolent god. Just like you.”

“We are not gods. We are born, we live, we die. Just as humans do.”

Loki chuckles. “Give or take five thousand years.”

Neither seems to notice my presence; I was usually reliving memories in my dreams, only being present if Bad Wolf had something to say.

The king is growing frustrated with Loki. “All this because Loki desired a throne.”

That clearly strikes a chord, his joking manner disappearing and replaced with a rage I had only seen once before. “It is my birthright!” He yells.

“Your birthright...was to die!” The king raises his voice to match Loki’s tone. “As a child. Cast out onto a frozen rock. If I had not taken you in you would not be here now to hate me.”

Loki resumes the joking manner of which he was so familiar. “If I’m for the axe, then for mercy’s sake, just swing it. It’s not that I don’t love our little talks it’s just...I don’t love them.”

“The Earth woman Thor told me of, this Rose Tyler,” Loki stiffens at my name, taking on a more serious, dangerous look as the mirth drains from him. I swear his eyes drift over to me, but they dart back to the king before I can really tell if he saw me.

“Leave her out of this, she has no part in my fate,” Loki practically growls.

“She is a potentially dangerous threat to Asgard. Thor speaks of a power within her, a power the likes of which has never before been seen; she will be under Heimdall’s watchful eye. Whatever connection she has to you seems to hold some semblance of influence over you, making her even more dangerous.”

“You think I care the fate of some mere mortal?” 

“Whatever exists between you is no longer relevant. She is the only reason you’re still alive, and you’ll never see her again. You’ll spend the rest of your days in the dungeon.” 

“And what of Thor? You’ll make that witless oaf King while I rot in chains?”

“Thor must strive to undo the damage you have done. He’ll bring order to the nine realms and then yes, he will be king.”

Everything around my dream self slowly comes to a stop, frozen in time. A voice from behind me shakes me out of my surprised state. “About time you let me in.”

I turn around with a jump, looking from the man in front of me to the place he had been standing moments before. “How...what’s...how are you doing this?”

Loki lets out a light laugh. “You’re dreaming, little wolf. I’d think that much was obvious.”

“Don’t talk to me like I’m an idiot! I know I’m dreaming. What I meant was how are you here? You’re world’s away and we never formed a psychic link, this shouldn’t be happening.”

He smirks, that dangerous one when he gets something he’s not supposed to have - the same one he had when he was talking with Fury on the helicarrier. “You think that’s the only way I’d be able to see you, to hear you? You let me into your mind once before, I just remembered the way and waited for you to let your guard down.”

My dreamself rolls my eyes. “So what, you expect me to believe you’ve been waiting weeks for me to ‘let you in’ just so you could talk to me? Why?”

“Do you still not understand? After everything I told you, why keep denying what you know is true?” He takes a step towards me, but I step back. A confused expression crosses his face.

“Look, I’m tired, and confused, and I don’t know what I know.” My answer seems to satisfy him, the confused expression gone. I try to change the subject before he wants to start playing with my emotions. “Aren’t you supposed to be taking over Asgard or something? Doesn’t look like you’re doing a very good job at the moment.”

“It’s an ongoing process, believe me. Becoming king does not typically happen overnight,” a darkness covers his face, reminding me that I don’t know this man as well as I think I do, “at least, not this time.”

“Answer me this, then: why am I here?”

“I’d like to take the credit, but this is all your doing, little wolf. You’ve been calling out to me in your dreams. Believe it or not, you are the one who needs me.”

“You’ve been saying that since we met!” I scoff. 

“And I was right, was I not? When you needed to calm yourself, to control your power, I was there!” His tone grows with his words. “You would’ve destroyed your precious Avengers with your power if not for me!”

My hands had curled into fists as he spoke, my exhaustion and exasperation at the world finally reaching the tipping point. “Look, I don’t care why you think I need you, but I don’t. And you don’t need me, you’ve made that clear. So just leave me alone!”

Silence follows for a few seconds. Time is still frozen around us. After a moment, Loki takes a step back and chuckles. “Such fire! I’ll leave you be for now, Rose Tyler,” my spine tingles with the way my name rolls off his tongue, “but you’ll see me again soon. You won’t be able to resist.”

Everything around us begins to fade away, until nothing but darkness remains, and I’m finally allowed to get some sleep.

 

It took me a moment to realize where I was when I eventually woke up, pulling off the piece of paper that was stuck to my face.  _ Great, _ I think,  _ I fell asleep at the table again. _ I’d been sharing the penthouse of a hotel, and so far had barely used my room to sleep in. 

It had been a month since the battle. Everyone but Tony and Bruce had already gone their separate ways at least two weeks ago. Today, however, was the day I say goodbye for now to my remaining teammates and head back home. Strangely enough, I didn’t want to go.

“Rose, did you sleep here again?” Bruce’s concerned voice says from next to me as he hands me a steaming cup of coffee. 

I let out a giant yawn as I accept the wonderful cup of caffeine. “Afraid so. Got caught up on my latest project. Besides,” I yawn again, “sleep is boring and normal. Who needs it?”

A concerned looks covers my friend’s face as he sits down across from me. “Stress keeping you up?”

“Something like that,” I chuckle. “More a combination of nightmares, stress, and a little more stress. Still worrying about keeping all this,” I point to my head, “contained and under control.” I trace the runes on the green cuff Loki gave me before he left. 

“You’re Rose Tyler! You’re the most controlled person I know - well, maybe besides Pepper. Although maybe she’s more controlling…” Tony muses as he walks out of his room to grab his own coffee.

“Thanks boys.” I smile. “I’m gunna miss you two.”

“Aww, come on now, Bad Wolf! The Defender of Earth can’t go getting all sappy!”

I give Tony a playful slap on the arm as he passes. Bruce smirks into his coffee. “I regret ever telling you that. Will I ever hear the end of it?”

“Defender of Earth is rather pretentious, but Bad Wolf isn’t too bad,” Tony tries to placate.

I start making a pile of my mess of papers spread over the table, stuffing them into my bag with my laptop. “I’ve got a flight to catch, boys.”

“If you need anything, we’re all just a phone call away,” Bruce smiles.

“Well, except Thor. And I doubt Cap knows how to work a phone. Did they have those back in his day?”

“Bye, Bruce. Bye, Tony,” I say with a small wave as I exit the penthouse and head down the elevator to find a cab.

 

I thought it would be an easy taxi ride to the airport and I’d be on my way back home.

But like I said, the Universe likes to prove me wrong.


	2. An Unexpected Encounter

It should have been an ordinary walk across the sidewalk towards the street, where I’d simply wave my hand out and call for a cab to take me to the airport. 

It  _ should _ have been. But it wasn’t.

As I walk out the revolving doors of Tony’s hotel, I pause to take one last long look at the city so good they named it twice. Although ready to go back home to London, I had rather grown to like this place. The Doctor talked about it often, I wish I could’ve have seen it with him.

The people of New York were not ashamed to show their appreciation for the heroes who saved them. The weeks following the battle had resulted in street art commemorating different Avengers, memorials for those who had died during the attack, and endless new reports on what the world would be like now. I couldn’t help but smirk as I saw a new edition to the street art on a brick wall across the street. It portrayed Steve in his Captain America uniform and shield, next to an all golden figure with no discernable face. Traveling with the Doctor and then working for a secret organization, I’d saved so many lives, but never really got any recognition for it - it was kind of nice to be acknowledged for once, even if no one would truly recognize who I was.

As I stare at the street mural, lost in thought about the Doctor, I am practically plowed over by a passing pedestrian. I look over and see the culprit, still walking on without so much as a glance back. “Oi, wanna watch where you’re going mate?” I call after the purple clothed individual. 

My mind literally goes blank as the man stops in his tracks and turns around to face me.

It couldn’t be him. He said it was impossible. But he looks identical, with the same brown hair (albeit styled carefully instead of wild) and slight stubble he would get when we stayed on the Tardis too long. He was dressed in a light purple dress shirt, with a patterned purple tie and matching midnight purple suit.  _ Odd _ , I think,  _ but the Doctor’s style has always been odd. _ “Doctor?” I whisper.

A feeling of emptiness fills me as this man looks at me with no recognition, only an expression of annoyance, like I was a piece of gum stuck to his shoe. “No, you ran into me. Now, say you’re sorry.” Even his voice sounds the same.

At his words, I feel a strange compulsion to apologize. I feel guilty, and I couldn’t figure out why.  _ He ran into me! It was his fault! _ I reason with myself. The more I think about it, the worse I felt - my head pounding, my heart racing, my forehead breaking into a sweat with the struggle. After finally getting my thoughts straight, I narrow my eyes at him. “No way! I won’t apologize for something that wasn’t my fault! And who do you think you are, trying to tell me what to do!”

Confusion takes over his face as this strange man stares at me. “No, it can’t be…”

“Look, it’s not that big a deal and I’ve got a plane to catch. Just watch where you’re going and try not to be a pillock?” I reply. 

“Who are you?” Not-the-Doctor commands.

Again, that same urge and compulsion to do what he says.  _ A non-terrestrial? _ I think, trying to place what planet might have compulsive abilities. 

The purple man’s face is growing frustrated now. “Answer me!” He hisses at me, purple tinted veins starting to pop out of his neck, like he was putting effort into talking.

“I...I’m Rose, Rose Tyler,” I finally blurt out. His frustration dims slightly, but not completely.

“You look familiar, Rose. Have I seen you somewhere before?” His tone is inquisitive, and almost curiously playful.

“Not unless you’ve got yourself a fob-watch with a lot of circles and markings on it.” I smile at this stranger, not afraid to be a little cheeky even if he does have strange abilities.

“Interesting?” He muses to himself. “You barely seem to register my commands at all.”

He grabs my arm and leads me to a little outdoor cafe just down the street. I don’t resist as he pulls a chair out for me and whispers for me to sit before taking the seat across from me. My ass drops into the seat like it’s made of lead. “I want to know all about you, Rose Tyler. Now, tell me, what are you doing here in New York. The truth now.”

I feel the compulsion again, but I obviously can’t tell this strange man the whole truth, even if he does look like the man I once trusted with my life. “I got called in on a work thing. Rather unexpectedly, too, which is why I’m eager to head back home.”

“And where might that be?”

“Currently living in London, but I have a bad habit of wandering off and never staying in the same place long.”

His eyebrows shoot up. “You’re British? I haven’t met anyone else from back home in some time! How exciting!” His expression darkens as he looks at me intently. “But you’re not telling me everything, are you, Rose Tyler?”

He speaks my name just like I remember it sounding so long ago, and can’t suppress a shudder. The feeling of compulsion is starting to get old. I shut my eyes tight and roll my head before answering to rid myself of the feeling. “How are you doing that?”

“Doing what?” he feigns innocence. 

“Making me want to do what you say.”

His lips form into a small smile. On the Doctor, it would have been endearing. On this man, it left me feeling strange. “You can feel it? Amazing, I’ve never met anyone who could resist me like that. It’s rather exciting, don’t you think?” He doesn’t let me answer before continuing. “You hesitated when you saw me back there. Why?”

Again with the compulsion. It was starting to be painful to resist. I grip the sides of the table with my hands to steady myself. He seems to notice. “Strange, my commands don’t seem to sit well with you. Let’s try this: will you tell me why you hesitated?”

The compulsion disappears and I can finally breathe again. “I really don’t think it’s any of your business,” I mumble.

He leans back in his chair, lounging like he didn’t have a care in the world. “Now, now, Rose. Here I am, trying to be polite, and you have to go spit in my face for my efforts. You know you should be polite to me, Rose, and you regret your actions.”

His words immediately slip into my thought patterns, more invasive than they had been before.  _ Maybe I have been rude, _ my thoughts start to flow, but not the way I want them to.  _ After all, it was just an accident that he ran into me, it’s not his fault he looks like the Doctor… _ I can feel myself spiraling, falling back down a rabbit hole of sorrow and guilt I was oh-so-familiar with. “I’m sorry,” I say softly, trying not to be overcome by the hole of guilt reopening inside my chest.

“That’s enough,” this dangerous stranger replies, his voice deep and filled with power. It cuts through my guilt like a knife, those thoughts melting away almost immediately. I had been hyperventilating without even realizing it, my chest rising and falling so fast it was hard to calm down. “There now, it’s all right,” the man says, placing a soft hand on one of my own. “You don’t seem to react well to me taking full control. Now, I want to continue having a polite conversation with you, but that doesn’t mean I won’t use my powers. Understand?”

Too busy trying to process what had happened, I simply nod. He seems placated for the moment. “Well then, since all that unpleasantness is behind us, care to tell me what line of work brought you to the city on such short notice?”

“Sorry, ‘fraid not. Like I said, was actually just heading back home. I am very interested in knowing who you are, however.”

He smiles. “Oh, you can call me Kilgrave, but I don’t feel like talking about me just now!”

“Kilgrave?” I scoff, unable to hide my smile. “What, was ‘snufcarcas’ too much for you?”

He frowns slightly. “Shame you want to leave so soon, Rose, I think we could have some fun. I think you should stay,” he says, his eyes narrowing at me.

I grimace in pain as I resist the urge to say “yes,” to stay, to please the strange man across from me. I’m losing control, Bad Wolf responding to my pain; my hands glow slightly and I start to panic. My wrist grows hot, and I realize the green cuff is absorbing most of the energy trying to escape.  _ “Fight it, Rose,” _ a familiar silky voice whispers in my mind, but I don’t focus on it long as my hands continue to glow with golden light.

Kilgrave watches me with fascination. “Jesus, you’re just full of surprises. Are you like me, then? Are you special?”

“Yes,” I blurt out, unable to resist and keep Bad Wolf contained.  _ You need to get away from him, NOW! _ My mind shouts. “You need to let me go,” I say, glaring across the table at him.

He cocks his head to the side. “Brave of you, trying to command me. Stupid, but brave.” He smiles at me again, and I can feel a pang in my chest as I wish so badly that the face staring back at me could be his. A glimmer of recognition appears in his eyes. “You’re the glowing girl from the attack, aren’t you? It’s my lucky day, getting to meet an Avenger! One of Earth’s Mightiest Heroes! We’re just getting to know each other, why are you in such a hurry to leave? Don’t you want everyone to know it was you who saved them? Or do you like keeping in the shadows?” 

“Oh, you know, things to do, people to see - there’s always more to do,” I dodge around the question, letting out a slight grunt instead of the sarcastic laugh I intended.

“Answer me honestly, Rose,” he practically growls.

“No one can know it was me. I’m not...I’m not safe.” I try to resist answering his questions, but all my energy is going towards containing the power inside me. 

“Glad to see you’re cooperating so well,” he smirks at me again. “So if you’re so dangerous, why are you opposed to meeting other people with power?”

“It’s not that. Seeing you - having to sit down and listen - it hurts,” I reply softly, giving into the compulsion. “I want you to be him so badly, but you’re not him. It’s like losing him all over again. Imagine having to lose the person closest to you over again, can you imagine what that feels like?”

His expression softens for a moment before he recovers and he takes my other hand in his. “I like you, Rose Tyler. You’re luckier than most; you’ve somehow managed to tug at my heartstrings today, and I respect that. Not many people I meet strike me as memorable. But you,” he smiles wider and looks at me like he wants to devour me, “oh, I like you. I sincerely hope we meet again someday.” He plants a quick kiss on the back of my hand and walks away, spinning around to smile at me before disappearing into the crowd.

I slump down into my chair, trying to process everything that just happened. My head falls into my hands and I let out a sigh. “Why does everything have to be so complicated?”

Slipping my bag back over my shoulder, I finally hail a cab and try to forget the lookalike Doctor as I make the drive towards the airport.

 

The seven hour flight to London, sans wifi, felt like forever. It didn’t really matter how many years I’d lived in this world, I still hadn’t adjusted to the mundane way of traveling. It was exhausting!

I try staying awake by watching the in-flight film, but they were showing some sappy romantic comedy and I really wasn’t in the mood to watch two characters overcome all the odds and get to live happily ever after. Life didn’t work that way.

After at least two hours, my boredom eventually turns to exhaustion, and I give in as another dream begins to form.

It isn’t the memory kind of dream, where I relive something that’s already happened. This was the same as last night.

I’m in an all white room, with one see through wall that glittered with gold, like a type of force field. There’s a few items of furniture spread out, with a large bed occupying the space in the middle. Sitting there, leaning against the headrest with a book in his hands, was the person I’d come to expect every time I fell asleep.  
“Loki.”

He doesn’t look up from his book to acknowledge my presence, and for a moment I doubt that he can see me this time. After a moment, his gaze still on the book in his hands, he replies, “Back so soon?”

“You make it sound like I’m trying to do this.”

He pats the side of the bed next to him. “Not trying, no. But I do not think you’re resisting very hard.”

I look at the spot on the bed he patted. “If you think this is that kind of dream…”

A smirk appears on his handsome face. “Don’t worry, little wolf. I only meant it as a polite gesture. Feel free to sit anywhere you like.”

I take in his words, and ultimately decide to sit there anyway. Plopping down next to him, I throw my feet on the bed and lean my head back on the headboard. “How can I feel tired in a dream?”

“Just because your body is resting does not mean your mind is doing the same.”

“Soooo, what now?” I question after a moment of silence. I glance around the room as he continues reading his book.

“Is there something you wanted to talk about? Some reason your mind might have opened up to me?”

My thoughts drift to what had just happened when I’d left the penthouse - to how Kilgrave looked and sounded just like the Doctor. “No,” I blurt out. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

Loki finally turns his deep green eyes on me, his gaze intense and calculating. I know he senses something, but I’m grateful he doesn’t press any further. “Why not tell me about your family? I would tell you about mine, but I believe you already know about most of my past.”

A minute or so pass before I finally decide to open up to the strangely comforting man next to me. “Back in my home dimension, my mum and I lived in London, in estate housing called the Powell Estate. When my dad was still alive, his Vitex health drink had completely flopped. I was just a baby when he died, but the Doctor had taken me back in time to say goodbye, and I’m glad I got to know my real dad, got to hold him in his last moments. My mum dated here and there after he died, but never found anyone else. She worked in a salon, and I worked in a shop. We were far from rich, but we had everything we needed, and we were happy. 

“Here in Pete’s dimension, my mum finally has everything she’d every dreamed of: reunited with a version of her husband who had lost his Jackie. In this world, his crazy Vitex company took off like a rocket, making him one of the richest men in England. It didn’t take long for them both to realize that they love each other, and within months my mum was pregnant with my little brother Tony. 

“Although Pete is the CEO of Vitex industries, he’s also the official head of the Torchwood Institute. I never thought I could work for the people responsible for tearing me away from the Doctor, let alone accept Pete as my father.” I pause, taking a deep breath before revealing another broken part from my past. “It was a rough transition - getting stuck here and learning to accept it. Several months in, my depression reached a peak, and Jackie yelled at me so long the only way to get her to stop was to get a job. I soon realized that this Torchwood was different, that Pete had changed them, that they were the only people that could get me home. I soon became addicted to my work, often staying there more than I was at home.

“Strangely enough, my little brother Tony’s arrival was what brought all of us together as a family. I’ll never admit it to my mum, but that little blond boy was the light that brought me out of the crushing depression. For the first three years here, I lived with Jackie and Pete in the Tyler mansion; on nights where the nightmares were overwhelming, Tony was a strangely calming presence. I’m afraid he may not be enough to help me anymore, though.”

“Sadly, my relationship with my sibling was never quite like that,” Loki mutters.

As I talked, I had moved closer to him, my head eventually coming to rest on his shoulder. My eyes felt heavy and I can’t resist a yawn. “Can you fall asleep in a dream?”

My head moves slightly as he chuckles. “You can do whatever you want in a dream.” He wraps a comforting arm around me and pulls me closer. “I’ll leave you be for awhile, let you get the rest you so desperately need.”

It felt good to fall asleep next to him, even if it wasn’t real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't resist adding in Kilgrave, since he exists in the same universe as the Avengers. And you probably haven't seen the last of him either!  
> Let me know what you thought of their interaction. I've written Kilgrave/Jessica scenes, but it was so different writing with Rose.  
> Already working on chapter 3, hopefully will have it up by next weekend.


	3. Back Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little look at Rose's home life

“Wose! Wose! You’re home!” My little brother runs into me like a rocket, grabbing onto me tightly. I smile at the little blond boy. He’d had trouble saying his “R’s” when he was first learning to talk, and I didn’t have the heart to correct his pronunciation of my name now that he could.

“Well hello to you too! How are you Tony? Hope you haven’t been causing too much trouble.” I scoop him up into a hug.

“I made a rocket yesterday! Wanna see it?” He looks up at me with wide eyes and a big grin.

“I’d love to!” A smile crosses my face to match his. Pete and Jackie walk into the room, both smiling at me. 

“Welcome home, sweetheart,” my mum says, crushing both me and Tony in a hug.

“Mummy, you’re squishing me,” Tony squeaks. 

Pete chuckles behind us. “We’re all glad you’re home, Rose.” I could tell he meant it, but there was something else there that he wasn’t ready to say in front of my mum.

“Wose, my rocket! Come and see it, please?” Tony asks pleadingly, looking up at me with large eyes.

“Alright, alright. Why don’t you take mum and go find it, and me and Pete will be up in just a moment.”

“Yeah, okay! Mummy let’s go!” He shouts, full of excitement.

As Tony pulls mum off to find his rocket (most likely made out of blocks), I to Pete to figure out what my adoptive father had on his mind. “You alright, Pete? You’ve got that face.”

He lets out another chuckle. “I have a specific face?”

“Yeah, it’s your ‘We need to talk business but not in front of your mother’ face.”

“Do I make that face a lot?”

Now it was my turn to chuckle. “Oh yeah, all the time. So, what’s on your mind.”

Pete stands there for a moment, looking thoughtful. His once blond hair was starting to turn grey, the wrinkles around his eyes becoming slightly more prominent. “We got the plans you sent. And I know you’re excited about the idea of using the Dimension Canon to jump, Rose, but we’ve been down this road before. We couldn’t get it to work five years ago, why would it work now?”

Any excitement I had leaves my body, like a balloon deflated of air. “I know Pete. But there’s no harm in trying. We might need it soon.”

His eyes narrow in suspicion. “What makes you say that?”

“Call it a feeling? Just trust me on this, Pete, something’s coming, something bad.”

“Rose, does this have anything to do with New York? All I have to go on is Mickey’s report and S.H.I.E.L.D., you’ve yet to say anything about it.”

“Pete, this isn’t about New York. Not really. Just...please, just trust me, yeah?”

“Yeah, alright. But don’t blame me when your mum finds out. She worries about you too much already.”

I force a small smile as I try not to feel guilty for keeping Bad Wolf a secret. 

“Rose, Pete, are you coming?” Jackie calls loudly down the stairs.

 

After admiring Tony’s toy rocket and tucking him into bed, I kissed mum and Pete goodbye before returning to my car to finally head to my flat to unwind and shower. 

It was a simple one bedroom flat in London, not far from the main Torchwood hub. I wanted to be more independent and not just rely on Pete and Jackie for everything, so I paid for my rent with my own money. And since I had a non-existent social life, I never had to pinch pennies in order to make rent.

I could splurge for a housekeeper, however.

I’d picked up a lot of habits from my time travelling with the Doctor, including a habit to be a bit messy when I was working on a project. And since I had a non-existent social life, I had a lot of time to work on new projects. There were papers taped and tacked all over the walls so you couldn’t even see what color they were painted. My coffee table and couch were littered with whatever I had been working on before I’d left for Stuttgart over a month ago. Thankfully I had had the sense to do the dishes before I left, meaning there weren’t any moldy cups or plates to deal with. 

After showering and throwing what few belongings I’d had with me from New York into my room, I realize this isn’t where I need to be. Slinging my bag back over my shoulder, I head out of my little flat and make the short walk to the Canary Wharf hub.

  
  


_ Three weeks later. _

 

_ Fizz! Crack! _ I stumble as I pop into the laboratory. Literally, pop into the room.

“Ugh!” I scream, making everyone in the Torchwood laboratory jump. “We’ve been working on the teleport for weeks, and all we’ve managed to do is teleport me from one end of the room to the other!”

“General Tyler, these things take time. We’re lucky we’ve even managed to make this much progress,” replies the lead scientist calmly. He was one of Torchwood’s finest mechanical engineers, specializing in extraterrestrial technology. 

Feeling my hands start to heat up with energy, I take a deep breath, tracing the runes of the green leather cuff on my wrist while trying to control my emotions. Since New York, I had had only one Bad Wolf outburst that I couldn’t control. Usually, the green cuff I constantly wore absorbed any time energy before it got out of hand. 

“I’m sorry for the outburst, Doctor Campbell. It’s just….frustrating.”

“Maybe we should call it a day? Your body has taken an incredible amount of physical strain…”

“I’m fine. Seriously, I can take it.”

“General Tyler, please,” Doctor Campbell’s voice lowers in concern. “You’ve been working on the canon project nonstop since you got back. By typical standards, your body shouldn’t even be able to handle this amount of stress. You need to rest, we all do, and then we can resume work.”

Not willing to start an argument I knew I wouldn’t be able to win, I glance around at the rest of room, the small team of scientists tasked with working on this project looking mentally exhausted. With a sigh, I concede. “You should all take the weekend off. We’ll pick up where we left off first thing Monday morning. Dismissed.”

Standing in the middle of the room, I watch them all file out. Doctor Campbell lingers. “Rose,” he says softly, foregoing protocol. “Excuse me for momentarily breaking protocol and speaking freely, but we’re all worried about you. You haven’t been…..the same since returning from New York. Agent Smith says you spend most nights here; you look like you’re barely sleeping these days, if at all. PTSD affects people differently. Perhaps you should talk to one of our psychiatrists, or reach out to one of your friends from S.H.I.E.L.D. who was there with you who understands your...situation.”

“It’s….complicated. I didn’t mean to cause anyone to worry; I do apologize. And you’re right, maybe I should reach out to one of my teammates.” I rest a hand on his arm, giving him a smile to lessen his worry. “Thank you for the advice. Take the weekend off, you need it as much as I do.”

With a nod, he leaves me alone in the room. I release a breath I didn’t even realize I’d been holding, walking over to the nearest empty work table and just lying back on it. Doctor Campbell was right about one thing: my body was physically exhausted. I assumed the reason I hadn’t had a Bad Wolf episode was because all my energy was being used to keep me upright. If not for piece of the Time Vortex living inside me, I would have collapsed weeks ago. As it was, it only took seconds after lying back on the hard surface for me to give into the darkness behind my eyelids.

Sadly, the small reprieve from the world lasted mere minutes before I was rudely awakened by an incessant ringing noise. Groaning, I retrieve my mobile - the source of the ringing - and hit answer. “Hello?” My voice comes out rough.

“Rose? It’s Tony.”

“Tony! Aren’t you a welcome sound!” I sit straight up, overjoyed to hear the sound of his familiar voice.

“Good God woman, you sound like you just woke up! Isn’t it afternoon over there?”

I chuckle, doing the mental math. “You’re one to talk! It’s it something like four in the morning over there?”

“Is it?” He sounds genuinely shocked at the time. “Huh, guess I should try to pay better attention. Jarvis,” he addresses his highly developed artificial intelligence system, “add a clock to my workspace.”

I can hear the semi-robotic voice over the phone reply, “Already working on it, Mr. Stark.”

“I tried to video call, but it appears your stone-age dinosaur phone doesn’t quite understand the concept.”

“My mobile happens to be way ahead of its time….just minus video calling. So is this a late night or early morning for you?” I jokingly ask.

“Oh, uh, well...a bit of both you could say.”

My breath escaped my lungs in a sigh, my whole body tensing as realization hits. All joking aside, my tone turns soft and serious. “You too, huh?” 

Tony sighs in return. “I was fine at first, but the more time that passes the worse it gets.”

“The scientists here keep calling it PTSD; but it feels more complicated than that. Honestly, sometimes it feels like it was all in my head, if not for the dreams...It’s all faded away here, become old news. But what happened haunts me still. I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep in weeks.”

There’s a moment of silence as he collects his thoughts. “I can’t stop thinking about it, Rose. Everything we saw that day: the battle, the aliens...the wormhole…I relive it everytime I close my eyes.” Tony’s breathing speeds up, and I can tell he’s heading towards a full on panic attack.

“Tony, listen to me. You’re safe now. You’re at home, in your workshop. Now, I need you to breathe deeply and calm down, otherwise you won’t hear anything I’m about to tell you.”

Slowly, I could hear his breathing become deeper and slower. Smiling sadly to myself, I start talking, keeping up my end of the bargain. “I’ve been in your place for the past five years - waking up every night in a cold sweat, haunted by nightmares of a crushing black void sucking me away from all that I love. I’d like to say it just goes away, like a cold or a bad haircut, but it never really does. It’ll get better, more tolerable, with time. Have you talked to Pepper about it?”

“Um no, no, not yet. Been working on some stuff in my spare time though. I’ve got this great new idea for Mark 42….” Tony begins drolling on about his newest suit. I had gotten fairly good at understanding technology, but could never keep up when Tony would start on one of his caffeine fueled monologues about how the flaps were different this time or how his newest suit could read his bio signature from miles away. Being the good friend though, I “ooohed” and “wowed” in the appropriate places.”

Finally, he changes the subject. “I totally forgot the reason I originally called! Pepper reminded me that mini-me’s birthday is coming up, and I figured it’d be a great excuse to get the whole gang back together in New York for a party. Kind of a joint birthday party slash unveiling of the new Avenger’s Tower.”

“You know you cannot continue calling my little brother ‘mini-me’ right?”

“Why not? The kid has never seemed to mind.”

I let out a sigh. “His birthday isn’t for another three weeks, so I’ll run it by Pete and my mum.”

“You could always fly out early to get some stuff moved into your room in the Tower so it feels more like home when you stay there if you want. Banner and I are heading out that way in a couple days.”

Now’s...really not a good time, Tony. I’m working on something, something really important.”

“Do tell?” Since Tony has never been able to hack into Torchwood’s database, he often tries to pry any information out of me about the institute that he can get. “You’ve let me help before.”

I bite my lip, my thoughts buzzing as I weigh the pros and cons of involving Tony in this. “I can’t say much, but...we’re working on a prototype teleport, but it’s going slower than I’d hoped,” I sigh again, my shoulders slumping in defeat as I glance around the lab, equipment and paperwork strewn about haphazardly.

“You should try calling Banner again. Last I checked, he’s done some research on the Einstein-Rosen bridge theory - your favorite topic. Or you could track down Thor’s girlfriend. He was bragging about how she worked with astrophysics or something. Come to think of it, you two might get along.”

“Tony!” I practically squeak with delight. “I could bloody kiss you right now!”

“Well,” he chuckles, “I won’t tell Pepper if you don’t.”

“Flirtatious much? But that’s a brilliant idea! You’re a genius you are!”

“Who are you and what have you done with Rose Tyler? She’d never give me a compliment that might inflate my ‘oversized ego’ as she calls it.”

I laugh. A real laugh that lets me forget the pain I have been hiding inside me. “Thank you, Tony. You don’t realize how amazing this is. I’ll keep you updated and see you soon for Tony’s birthday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taken me so long to post this, been dealing with some personal stuff and wasn't feeling all that up to writing. But I pushed on, and should have the next chapter up in a week or two.


	4. Siblings and Surprises

It’s the first day off I’d had in...I dunno, maybe since Norway. Despite my desire to continue working on the Canon project, I had promised to give my team the weekend off. Apparently that meant I was supposed to take the weekend off as well - or at least that’s what conclusion my mum and Pete had jumped to when I told them I’d given the team time off. 

So here I am, lounging on a couch in my flat with my blond-haired little brother curled up next to me, eating cookies and watching some animated movie he’d picked out. Funny how I could never say no when asked me to watch Tony, despite the work I felt I should be doing.

“Wose, was Hercules real?” The five-year old asks me, pointing to the animated character singing on the screen. “Did you ever meet him with the Doctor?”

I smile and wrap my arm around his small figure. “No, Tony, I don’t think Hercules was real. He’s more like a fairytale, like the Easter bunny.”

“Oh,” he replies, slightly disappointed with my answer. Every couple of minutes, he came up with a new question to ask, but I didn’t really mind.

My eyes roll slightly as the movie continues. “Of course the girl needs the big strong man to save her,” I mutter, too quiet for Tony to hear.

“Remind you too much of your past?”

I jump and let out a small scream, disturbing Tony. 

“What? It’s a bug? Kill it, kill it!” He starts shouting.

I look over at the figure leaning against the doorframe across from us, then back at Tony. He doesn’t seem to see the green and leather clad man who appeared out of nowhere, continuing to look back and forth over the ground for an imaginary bug.

I stomp my foot on the floor to squish the non-existent bug. “It’s okay, Tony. I got it.” He calms slightly, relaxing back onto the couch. I look back at the god in the doorway and watch as he smirks at me before turning and walking into the little kitchen. “Uh, I’m gunna get us some more snacks. You’re good here, yeah?”

“Yeah, all good,” Tony mumbles back, his attention riveted to the battling cartoons.

Ruffling his hair a little bit, I stand up and follow the God of Mischief into my kitchen.

“Lovely place you’ve got here,” Loki says dryly, looking down at the dirty dishes making a pile in my sink.

“Look, if you’re just going to insult my home, feel free to leave.” I cross my arms, less than pleased to have him insulting my mess of a flat, despite the disaster zone it was. Mostly though, I was feeling that void of pain threaten to open up and consume me again at having to face an illusion of another man who’d left me behind.

“Oooh, such bitterness. Last we spoke you seemed much more inclined to my presence,” he smirks.

“What are you even doing here? Are you real or am I just hallucinating?” I hiss, not wanting Tony to hear me talking to myself.

His face suddenly softens, an expression I was starting to think only appeared when we were alone. “You’re not hallucinating, little wolf. It’s really me.”

I reach my hand out to touch him, hesitating before I make contact. “But I can’t touch you can I? You’re not really here…” I mumble.

“Not yet, no. But it won’t be long and I’ll be standing in front of you, free for you to... _ touch, _ ” his voice drips with unspoken meaning.

I just roll my eyes in response. “What, so haunting my dreams wasn’t good enough?”

Loki tilts his head in question. “Rose.” Despite my pain and anger in this moment, I couldn’t resist the slight shiver that runs down my spine as my name rolls off his tongue. “If you truly don’t wish to see me, you need only say the word and I will leave. I only wanted to see you, see the real you.”

My breath comes out as a long sigh, my anger deflating slightly. “Look, you can’t just show up out of nowhere, especially,” I lower my voice again so Tony wouldn’t hear me, “especially not around Tony. I don’t want him getting messed up in all this.”

“Wose?” The aforementioned child calls from my sitting room.

“Just a sec,” I reply loudly before turning my attention back to the man standing in front of me. “Look, feel free to stay, if you want. Just no more comments about my flat and don’t let Tony see you.”

“Don’t worry, only you can see me,” he smirks, following closely as I grab a few cookies from a baking sheet and drop them on a plate. 

I plop back down on my couch, trying to pretend there wasn’t an alien god only I could see sitting next to me. Tony scoots closer, grabbing a cookie and leaning his head against my arm. 

The movie was almost over, the titular character having rescued the girl and offered the chance to become a Greek god. “Wose, why do you glow like that?” My little brother asks as he reaches for another cookie.

Both Loki and I look at the little boy in bewilderment. “What?” I question with a smile as Tony looks up at me wide-eyed. 

“You were on the TV fighting the bad aliens, and you looked like Hercules. Don’t tell mummy. Daddy says mummy doesn’t like aliens. Are you an alien?”

“Why do you think that was me?”  _ He couldn’t have been able to identify me, no one could, _ I reason to myself.

“It looked like you. And daddy says it’s your job to fight the bad aliens.”

“Quite the perceptive child,” Loki mutters quietly.

“Tony, listen to me. You can’t tell anybody that was me, yeah? It’ll be our secret,” I tell my brother.

“Okay,” he finishes off his cookie. “Are you a superhero now, like Iron Man?” He asks, his words distorted from the large bite of cookie still being chewed up. 

“Guess I am, sort of,” I reply with a smile.

He doesn’t say anymore, content to finish the movie and eat the rest of the cookies. Loki watches us both intently, as if studying the relationship between the two siblings next to him.

“I’ve already got part of an all-powerful Time Vortex living in my head, now I’ve got an egotistical god hanging out up there too? And here I thought my life couldn’t get any weirder,” I remark an hour later, once Tony had fallen asleep next to me.

“Come now, I’m not just in your head. I’m merely a projection that only you can see.”

“Yeah, I understand the projection part,” I reply with a sour tone.

He pauses, turning his whole body to face me. “Rose, why are you so troubled with my presence?”

I let a moment of silence go by before I respond. “You’ve been in my head enough, you should know why.” He continues to look at me with a questioning look, silently pressing me to continue. “The last time I saw  _ him _ , he showed up on a beach in Norway. But he wasn’t really there, it would have ripped both of our worlds apart for him to come back to me - he was just a projection. He burnt up a sun, just to get enough power to say goodbye, but disappeared before we could even say everything that needed to be said. I don’t like holograms or projections because it reminds me too much of the worst day of my life.”

He reaches out to touch me, his hand hovering over mine for a moment before he pulls back. And despite his claims to just be a projection, I could swear I felt a slight pressure from his hand before he pulls away.

“You can stay,” I practically whisper, finally looking over into his deep green eyes. “Just don’t let anyone notice you.”

 

Didn’t take long for somebody to notice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO SORRY THIS HAS TAKEN SO LONG!  
> I really meant to have this part finished and edited last weekend, but I got a little distracted when my boyfriend proposed!   
> Already working on chapter 5, I promise I won't make you wait as long this time.  
> As always, I love reviews of any kind, so please leave any thoughts, comments, sarcastic remarks, or something you'd like me to throw in :)


	5. Arguments all around

Before Mickey had left New York, we’d agreed to only tell the Avengers about Bad Wolf’s reawakening, and even what I did end up telling them wasn’t the whole truth. I could only imagine Jackie’s reaction if she found out I wasn’t quite myself anymore. If Pete found out, Jackie would pry the secret out of him in no time. I could face down a horde of any Daleks, sure, but facing my mum when she’s angry...it was enough to make even the bravest of men cower.

Mickey was my best mate, and we used to tell each other everything - that is until recently. I’d barely seen him since returning home; he was either out on assignment or I was holed up working in the lab. But he is still my best friend, and he knows me better than anyone else in this dimension.

Figures he would notice something was different.

He catches up to me as I’m walking into the Torchwood hub a week after Loki had shown up in my flat, falling into step beside me and Loki’s illusion. “Hey babe, haven’t seen much of you lately. Thought you might have gotten lost in that basement.” He bumps my shoulder and gives me a grin.

I could sense Loki’s annoyance, but I ignore it and smile back at my best mate. “Hey Mick! Didn’t know you knew the basement existed since I’ve never seen you down there,” I tease, earning a smile in return. We walk in together just like old times, something we hadn’t done since I started on the Canon Project, catching each other up on our work. 

“Oh! I almost forgot! Stark is throwing a ‘birthday party’ for little Tony next weekend in New York, a sort of excuse to unveil the new Avengers Tower. You should come!”

A small frown appears. “I dunno, Rose. That’s kind of your thing, isn’t it? Just don’t really feel like I fit in with that lot.”

“What? Just cause you aren’t a super soldier or freakishly rich billionaire with fancy armor? You know Barton and Romanov don’t…”

“Yeah, yeah, I know they don’t have any special powers but it’s just...it’s your thing, babe. It’s like when I joined in with you, ole big ears, and the captain of the innuendo squad.”

“Nonsense, Mick, you’re part of the team! You’re an Avenger!”

“Am I though? Am I really, Rose? Cause last I checked, Stark doesn’t even know my name. Despite everything we’ve been through together, despite everything I’ve done, I’m still just the tin dog in the backseat.”

“Mick, no!” I try to protest, but he doesn’t let me finish, unleashing his emotions out of nowhere like a storm wind. Loki stiffens beside me, glaring daggers at the other man.

“Admit it, Rose, you’ve been different ever since…” he lowers his voice and leads me off to the side with a hand on my elbow, “ever since Bad Wolf came back, ever since you got messed up with that cocky green wanker. I know you don’t want to hear it, but he got his claws in you, babe!”

“Don’t listen to him,” Loki whispers in my ear, suddenly impossibly close, yet still not touching.

Mickey continues, the anger that was previously in his expression hidden by the concern in his eyes as he looks at me. “He’s in your head, isn’t he?” Mick asks softly. “All those nightmares and dreams you’ve been having, they’re cause of him. He’s controlling you, Rose, he’s not who you think he is. I’ll bet it’s that damn green cuff on your arm!”

I instinctively cover the cuff with my hand, conflict running rampant through my mind.  _ He hasn’t been controlling me, has he? He gave me this cuff to help me keep control...didn’t he? _

“Speak my name, Rose. Speak my name and I can come to you, I can protect you,” Loki stands directly in front of me, between Mickey and I. The look on his face isn’t the smug expression he should have had if he was trying to control me; instead, it was the same face he’d had before the Battle of New York - almost soft, almost caring.

“I don’t need protection anymore,” I whisper.

Mickey notices me staring at the space Loki stood, and his brows scrunch together. “You’re not talking to me, are ya? He’s in your head right now, yeah? He’ll drive you round the bend, Rose!” He reaches out and grabs my arm, pulling the cuff off.

“Mick, no!” I hiss, too distracted to stop him. As soon as the cuff leaves my skin, I freeze, holding my breath and waiting for something terrible to happen.

I don’t explode. I don’t lose control. I look around to make sure the world hasn’t fallen away around us. The other Torchwood employees continue walking in and out of the lobby like nothing happened. Only Mickey is left in front of me, holding the cuff and staring at me like he was waiting for me to start yelling at him. “You good, babe?” 

“Yeah, I’m...I’m good,” I mumble, still waiting for something to explode. “Can I have that back please?”

Mick looks at me suspiciously, his eyes narrowing. “What is it anyway? Why’s it so important?”

“It’s a dampener,” I sigh, continuing to explain after seeing the confused look on his face. “It helps me stay in control, so I don’t hurt anyone. It acts like a sponge, absorbing residual Time Energy I give off when it comes out. Honestly, Mick, all it’s done is help.”

He steps into my space, tucking the cuff into his pocket. “I don’t think you need it. I think you need to train, to learn control without the help of some space god’s trickery.” I go to reply but he cuts me off. “I’m here for you, Rose. If it gets bad, call me, and I’ll be right there. Can we please just try to get you back to normal?”

I shoot my friend a tight lipped smile. “I’ll never be normal again, Mick. From now on, it’s just damage control.” I walk away before he can argue with me, pulling out my phone and texting Pete as I walk out the door I’d walked in only 10 minutes ago. 

 

**Hey Pete, not feeling so great, gunna need the day off**

**\--Rose**

I head straight back to my flat, completely alone again. Despite my hatred of holograms, I was starting to like the company. But now he was gone again.  _ I guess Mick was right, maybe he was using me. Maybe that cuff was how he was in my head. _

My thoughts were threatening to consume me as I park my car and trudge up the stairs to my flat. I look around at all the paperwork covering my flat, normally a comforting sight but now just reminding me of how stuck I felt here. Suddenly, all I wanted was to be able to look over and see my lonely god standing there, to be able to talk to him. To hold his hand. Making up my mind, I make a beeline to my bathroom and throw open my medicine cabinet, looking through it until I find what I’m looking for: sleeping pills Doctor Campbell had prescribed after he noticed the dark circles under my eyes.

Swallowing the amount printed on the bottle, I walk into my room and collapse on my bed, waiting for sleep to take me.

Just like I’d hoped, dreams found me almost immediately. 

As expected, I dream of my lonely god. This time, he was alone, in a white and gold room. There were books and various furniture positioned around the room, with a bed against the center of the wall. There’s a small ache in my chest as I see Loki there reading a book; his tall, muscular frame sitting straight and regal, ankles crossed. This must be his cell on Asgard.

“Must you always wear such unflattering attire?” 

I look around the cell, then down at myself; there was no one else in here except me and him. 

“I would think that as leader of your mighty organization and ‘Defender of Earth’ you could afford to dress better, like the night we first met: you looked ravishing.”

Words escape me as I try to put my thoughts together to form a coherent sentence.

Turning a page, still focusing on the book in his hands he says, “Speechless in my presence? Rather out of character for you, little wolf.”

Feelings I thought I had buried started bubbling to the surface, still fresh in my mind after the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that had started to appear before I went to sleep. “Some acknowledgement would have been nice,” I mumble under my breath.

Setting down his book and standing up, his eyes narrow as he really takes me in, scanning my body before stopping on my face. “Forgive me for saying so, but you look terrible.”

“Always the words a girl wants to hear,” I retort sarcastically. “I’m fine though. If you were so concerned about my wellbeing I would have thought you’d say something when I could still see you. You can’t show up without the cuff, though, can you? But that doesn’t really matter, does it?”

“Darling, I am the god of lies; don’t insult me by trying.” He stalks around me, like a predator circling their prey. “I know you better than you think. What might your infuriating friend have said to drive you such distress?”

A fresh wave of anger runs through me. “ _ You know me better than I think? _ ” I yell back at him. “Then you should know I can’t sleep, I live in a constant state of exhaustion; I can’t eat; I’m barely existing at all. The only thing keeping me alive is this...this power inside of me that I don’t even understand! You claim to know me, you claim to understand me, but still you did the one thing that hurt me the most: you left me behind! And to top it all off, you’ve been using me this whole time, letting me think...” I broke off, unable to spit out the words,  _ letting me think you cared. _

He stops in front of me; the calm leaves his face, taking on a darkness I’d never before seen. “You knew I couldn’t stay on Midgard. You said you understood!”

“I didn’t expect you to stay!”

“Prey tell, then, what did you want?” His voice is raised to match my own.

“I wanted a choice, and you took it from me!” My voice cracks as tears began to slowly roll down my cheek, the anger turning to despair. “I have experienced more pain in my short life than most humans face in a lifetime. I held my father in my arms as he died. A man I loved left me behind, taking the choice of what I wanted away from me; I had to absorb the entire bloody Time Vortex to get back to him and save his sorry ass! I was sucked away from my home and that same man by monsters who know no mercy. But the  _ cruelest _ thing I have had to endure was you - giving me a glimpse of hope, a feeling that I belonged again, sparking emotions within me I didn’t know I was capable of feeling...and then leaving me to wither away,  _ alone _ . You may have been there, but I couldn’t touch you! I couldn’t be with the only person who makes me feel whole again!”

“You think I wanted this? Yes, I could have asked you to run away with me. But would you have fought your friends, left your family, to help a man you only just met? Being apart from you has wounded me far worse than any punishment I have endured, but I had hoped to spare you such pain.” His words are a whisper, standing so close in front of me he was almost touching me. “The last thing I want is to cause you any more pain at my hands.”

“I could have come with you,” I whisper in return. 

“No,” he replies, suddenly stern and stiff. “I may not have given you the choice like you wanted, but it was only because I wanted to protect you. You would have been imprisoned or enslaved, sent far away from Asgard. As it is, you are already under Asgard’s constant watch. Odin fears you. He fears what he cannot understand or control. The cuff I gave you aids in hiding your power from Asgard’s ever watchful eyes.”

I look down at my now empty wrist. “I don’t have it anymore, Mickey...”

“Yes, I was there when that annoying cur assaulted you. I could have prevented it, all you need do is say my name and call for me.”

“Yeah, about that,” I say, crossing my arms over my chest in a defensive stance, trying to pull myself back together after letting all my emotions out moments before. “I had some time to think about all that after you disappeared. Mickey was right, wasn’t he? You were using me and that cuff.”

Loki takes a step back and grins at me. “You’ve put it all together, I see? So clever, little wolf.”

“You never outright lied to me, you just didn’t tell me everything. It keeps my power under control and hides me from Asgard, but it also works as a doorway, yeah? And now that I’ve charged it enough, you have enough power to escape this place. But I have to summon you for the magic to work.”

“Well done, darling. I’m impressed. I admit I withheld some truths from you, but would you have gone along with it if I’d told you?”

“But see, there it is again! You didn’t give me the choice!” I hope the cell is sound proof, otherwise my yelling was likely to attract a guard.

Loki chuckles, “Glass houses, Rose. I admit I may have not told you the whole truth, but when were you going to admit to me how you’re working to leave and go back to your precious Doctor?” He may have been smiling, but there was a dangerous tone to his voice.

“I’m not…”

“Don’t lie to me!” He practically screams.

“The stars are going out,” I stay calm, a new type of sadness coming over me. “The universe, this world, the Doctor’s world, they’re all in danger. Something’s coming, a darkness that I can’t stop without the Doctor’s help. I can either ignore it and stay here, letting everything fall to the darkness and become nothing, or I can find the Doctor and stop it. I’ve made my choice, and I choose to help people, to defend this world. And I...I want you to come with me.”

Confusion covers his handsome features, taking on a sarcastic tone. “I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, darling, but I’m not exactly the hero type.”

“You saved me.”

His mocking tone evaporates as he became deathly serious. “That’s different.”

“Loki, the entire universe, every universe is in danger….that puts me in danger as well. You wouldn’t want me to go face this danger alone, would you?” I smile at him, my tongue poking out between my teeth in flirtation, reverting back to our old ways.

Loki growls. “Quite the manipulation, darling. If only you were physically here...I would take you right now.” He softens and rolls his eyes. “Yes, if that’s what you desire, how can I refuse? I don’t plan on ever letting you out of my sight if I can help it.”

“What do you mean I’m not physically here?” I ask confused, slowly laying a palm against his chest. “But I can feel you.”

“A form of you may be here, but your body is still back on Earth, feeling everything you feel now,” his hands wrap around my hips, slowly sliding around to cup my ass before roughly pulling me flush against his body. “Every touch, every kiss…” Loki lowers his head to start kissing a line up my neck. I tilt my head around, trying to press my lips to his before he pulls back just slightly and letting out a growl. “You don’t even know the effect you have on me, do you little wolf?”

I blush in response, unable to hid how my heart was thudding in my chest and the tightness growing below my stomach.

“As I suspected,” he says with a grin before scooping me up and cradling me to his chest. 

“What’re you doing?”

“Taking you to bed,” he states matter-of-factly.

“But I thought...I mean, you said…” I sputter.

A genuine smile covers his face as he laughs. “As much as I like how your mind is working, there are other things I intend at the moment.” Gently, Loki lies me down on his bed, pulling me close against his chest as he settles next to me. 

Even though I know I’m already asleep and dreaming, I still felt tired. Loki runs his fingers through my hair, my head resting on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. 

“It shouldn’t take much longer,” I promise, my voice deeper with fatigue. “We’re slowly but surely making progress. Granted, the technology is proving more difficult than I had originally thought it would, since we already had an original version to work with.” 

He chuckles. “You humans and your technology. It has its uses I’ll admit, but there are...other ways. Energy is a powerful thing with many different forms. You contain quite a large amount of energy yourself, it could be the catalyst you need to reach your endgame.”

The wheels in my head started turning, ideas flooding my brain. “I don’t know how...or if I can...”

He kisses the top of my head. “Just believe in yourself, like I do.”

Too many emotions flooded through my system: I was still angry at him for lying to me, but I was also relieved to finally be able to touch him, to feel him again. 

“Sleep now, darling. I promise not to go anywhere.”


	6. First Jump and Second Meeting

I woke well rested for the first time in a long, long time. 

With a deep breath, I slowly opened my eyes and stretched, not a trace of exhaustion anywhere in my body. Reality hit me all too soon as the first thing that greeted me upon opening my eyes was the loud ringing of my cell on my nightstand.

With a groan and a stretch, I pluck my mobile and look at the caller ID on the screen before pressing answer. “Hey Mick.”

Mickey sounds abnormally worried. “Jeez babe, what the hell happened? Pete said you called in sick.”

“Look, I just needed some space. I needed to think, you know?” 

“Babe, I’m sorry I got so upset with you earlier, but we really need you down here today,” my friend answers. “The latest Astro-report came in and...well...you were right.”

The stress that came with that sentence hit me like a ton of bricks; feeling like a new weight had been added to my shoulders. The day I had been dreading had finally arrived. 

“It’s Callufrax Minor,” Mickey’s voice says sadly. “It’s gone, Rose. It’s just...gone. All the stars in its vicinity disappeared as well, but there’s no sign of destruction or cloaking; it’s like nothing was ever there in the first place.”

“Guess I’d better get my ass down there and figure the cannon out then.” In my haste to talk to Loki, I had forgotten to even take off my boots before collapsing on the bed. Grabbing my keys from where I’d tossed them, I dash out of my flat and back towards Torchwood.

The entire hub was bustling more than normal when I arrive, everyone seemingly given a new desire to finish whatever task they were working on before the end of the world. The normally optimistic air within the building was now tense and worried, all the faces I see grim. I put an extra kick in my step, skipping the elevator and choosing to keep moving down the stairs, not stopping until I reach the Cannon project laboratory door. Doctor Campbell jumps as I throw the door open and stride in.

“Rose? I thought you called in sick today?”

My mouth forms into a tight lipped smile. “That was until Callufrax Minor up and disappeared, doctor. Right then, let’s get me hooked up and ready to go. I’m feeling lucky today!”

Once seeming to overcome his apparent shock, Doctor Campbell springs into action, giving orders and getting the Dimension Cannon up and running. A nervous looking lab tech hands me the trigger, a disc sized yellow and silver button that would launch me where I need to go. Since it was the same tech that had brought me to this universe to begin with, they never bothered to change the design, reminding me of the worst day of my life every time I held it. 

“I must warn you, Rose, the coordinates algorithm is still being perfected. If this does indeed work, there’s no guarantee you’ll reappear where you want. It’s dangerous.”

“Doctor Campbell, if I didn’t do something because it was dangerous, I’d still be working in a shop, yeah? 

The doctor nods his understanding, signaling to the other lab techs to begin the countdown. Something Loki had said in my dream comes to me,  _ “You contain quite a large amount of energy yourself, could be the catalyst you need to reach your endgame.” _ I place the trigger in my jacket pocket, closing my eyes and clenching my hands into fists. Without the cuff, I could feel Bad Wolf again, a gentle nudge in the back of my mind that was both comforting and worrying at the same time. Concentrating, I try to will some of that power through me to the cannon. I can hear the countdown in the background:  **5...4...3...2...1…**

With a flash of gold and a pop, the laboratory vanishes from my sight. I reappear at a run, slowing myself down as soon as my feet hit the ground. Finally coming to a stop, I land with a thud on cold, hard dirt, feeling incredibly drained.  _ Great, I’m a bloody TARDIS! _ I think to myself. I do a mental checklist before opening my eyes to take in my surroundings -  _ legs, check. Arms, still have two. Hands, fingers...head still attached...okay! _

With a groan, I open my eyes and push myself up to look around. Wherever I was, it was dark out, with tall buildings and cars all around me. After several moments, I finally summon the strength to get myself up and get my bearings. The sky was several different shades of blue, so I guessed it was early morning sometime. The buildings around me look strangely familiar, but I can’t figure out why. It all suddenly clicks when I look up and see the building horizon, where a strikingly familiar skyscraper with an obnoxiously large “A” stands out among the rest.  _ New York, the city so good they named it twice _ . I can’t help but smile at the welcoming sight.

“Well what do we have here?” A haunting voice breaks through the relative silence.

I turn around and take in the figure coming towards me, brown hair and a long coat. “Doctor?” I hopefully call out. Once he’s a few steps closer, though, and as he steps under a light I can see the purple of his clothes, my hope immediately fading away.

In a few more strides, he’s in front of me, a face both so familiar and so strange looking down at me. “Rose Tyler,” my name rolls off his tongue, his voice making me shiver despite my dislike for the version of the man before me. “I’ll admit, this is a pleasant surprise! I didn’t expect to see you again after our last lovely meeting.” He smiles down at me like I was an early Christmas present.

“Kilgrave,” I sigh. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I was really hoping it wouldn’t be this you I ran into today.” I motion to his entire self as I talk. 

“Ah, now, don’t be like that!” He falls into step beside me as I begin walking away towards Avengers tower. My phone battery didn’t make it through the jump, meaning the only places I could go were Avengers Tower or S.H.I.E.L.D. “Where are you off to in such a hurry?”

I roll my eyes at his insistent questions. “Isn’t it too early for you to be ordering innocent people around?”

“Rose, stop,” he commands. My body is too drained from the jump to resist, and immediately my feet stop moving. He walks around to stand directly in front of me, so close I can smell his expensive cologne. “We both know you don’t respond well to my powers, but I will use them if you continue with this behavior. Tell me you understand.”

“I...I understand,” I mumble back, my body shaking from the strain of fighting his compulsion. 

He nods and has the audacity to smirk at me. “See how much easier it is to just talk to me? Just be civil and there’s no need for any more ugly displays. You can move again.”

My whole body seems to sigh at the release. “If you must know, I don’t work normal hours, and it’s the middle of the day in London...I think, so it makes sense it would be early morning on this side of the pond. Got here by accident, now I just have to figure out how to get back home. Figured that would be the best place to start,” I point towards Avengers Tower.

Kilgrave grabs my arm and stops me again. “Rose, did you hit your head? It’s late evening, not morning.”

“No, no, no, it can’t be! It was only noon when I left!” My mind was whirring, my anxiety and stress, coupled with the sheer exhaustion from the jump were teetering over a dangerous peak, leading towards a complete meltdown.  _ Without the cuff, I could destroy everything _ . 

“Deep breaths now,” that soothing voice commands. My lungs fill up with much needed air on their own, distracting me from the coming panic attack. He pulls me close, enclosing me in his arms, “There there, I’m here. It’s all right.”

I hate that his words and actions actually bring me comfort. He keeps me close until my breathing slows and I calm down, finally letting me pull away - although still keeping his hands on my arms. 

“I was just thinking about getting a bite to eat, and you look famished. You like Chinese. Come on.” He grabs my hand in his and steers me away, my feet obeying his demand and following along.

 

I barely stay awake through all of dinner, stumbling repeatedly as he steers us a few blocks away into an extravagant hotel.  _ Jackie would love this place, _ I think as I take in the plush carpeting and sparkling chandeliers. A nagging feeling has been building in my gut since stepping foot in this building, but now feeling more like alarm bells ringing in my ears. He leads me into an elevator, pressing the button for the top floor. 

“You look exhausted, Rose. You want to stay here for tonight, don’t you.” It was less of a question and more of a command, the kind he’s been giving me all night. This time, however, it didn’t click.

“No, I should really go,” I try to argue, pulling my hand from his and trying to walk out the door of the penthouse he’d just led us into.

“Stop, Rose,” his voice loses its playful edge, going cold. “Close the door, and come here.”

My muscles betray me, following his orders as my mind screams to get the hell out of there. “Kilgrave, why am I here?”

He makes a scoffing noise, like the answer was obvious. “Cause you’re special, Rose. Like me, though not quite as good.” He smirks, that smirk that was so endearing and sexy on the Doctor. “You have gifts, powers, and that makes you different! And the way you resist, no one’s ever been able to do that before. I’ve got to say, it’s rather intriguing.” His eyes rake all over my body, leering in a way that leaves me feeling dirty. “I’d love to find out what makes you so special, to see what all you’re capable of. You’re already attracted to me, why not stay with me? We can see what all we’re capable of together.”

“You’re joking, right? I live in London, I have a very important job. And I can’t stay, even if I did want to. But I don’t, cause every time I look at you I think of him. And I hate that, cause it ruins the little things that I loved about him.”

His face darkens. “After everything that I’ve done for you tonight - comforted you, took you to a five-star restaurant, given you a more than comfortable place to stay - and all you are is ungrateful. Unbelievable.”

I sigh, too tired to deal with the tantrum-throwing-doppelganger in front of me. “Look, I’m sorry, yeah? Thank you for dinner.”

His demeanor relaxes, his face taking on a placated expression as he lets out a sigh. “Well then...just get ready for bed. I think we could both use the sleep.”

My fingers twitch, my mind winning against this compulsion. I usually sleep in nothing but my underwear, but I don’t trust Kilgrave to keep his hands to himself. Especially since he’s peeling off his clothes, laying his purple jacket and tie neatly over a chair. He pauses as he’s unbuttoning his shirt, looking at my twitching fingers curl into fists and release, only to repeat the motion.

“What’s wrong, darling?”

“I...I can’t.” I unconsciously cover my abdomen with my fist. 

“Why not? Tell the truth now.”

That horrible haze came over me, the one where I my mind was at war from both wanting to tell the truth and wanting to resist. Words eventually spill out, my heart racing and my breathing so fast my head was dizzy. “I don’t trust you, and you’ll see me.”

“Hahaha, I can see you already.” He smiles, walking over to me. Cupping my cheek in his hands, he looks at me intently. “What are you hiding? Show me.”

I grimace as I slowly pull up my shirt and move my fist out of the way, revealing a large jagged scar. 

“My God!” His words are barely a whisper as he kneels down in front of me, running a hand over my damaged skin. After a few moments, he takes my hand in his, leading it to the back of his neck and up into his hair. 

I gasp when my fingers brush against scars, countless lines and bumps hidden in his brown mane. 

He places a small kiss on my abdomen, “You’re not the only one with scars, Rose.”

I pull my hand away and step back. “Don’t try to empathize with me, please. I’m not...I’m not normal.” He opens his mouth to try and protest but I cut him off. “We’re not the same, you and I. Whatever happened to you, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

A light ringing sound interrupts me. We both pause, and I realize it’s coming from my pocket. My brows narrow in confusion as I pull out the round button, the ringing alarm growing louder as it’s no longer muffled. “What the hell…?” Kilgrave starts, jumping up. “Rose,” he warns, his voice full of menace as the dark expression returns.

_ The button is beeping, which means it has to have some power, _ I think, knowing I only have moments before Kilgrave snaps.  _ If it has power, that means it could make another jump. All it needs is a little boost. _ Closing my eyes, I feel for Bad Wolf, hearing her howl as she comes out. I open my eyes, my vision tinted gold as I see Kilgrave staring at me with wide eyes as I press the button and pop out of existence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **The Kilgrave in this story is pre-Jessica. I'm designing his obsession over Jessica coming from his original intrigue in Rose and new found desire to control a powered person.
> 
> I'M SO FREAKING SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG! I rewrote this chapter 4 times and had finals this last week, so safe to say it was a very long couple weeks.  
> I'm hoping to post a new chapter every 2-3 weeks coming up.  
> As always, feel free to share your thoughts, criticisms, suggestions, or sarcastic remarks :)


	7. Of New Dangers and Threats

I don’t know how I’m still alive. My head is pounding as I reappear, popping into existence. Instead of landing on my feet and gradually coming to a stop like before, I collapse onto the ground with a crushing force. Every muscle in my body burns, and my head pounds worse than a bad hangover. “Okay, bad idea that one,” I moan out.

Glancing around, I can tell I’m sitting in the middle of an alleyway somewhere, but I have no idea what city, or even what country I’m in. With a large amount of difficulty, I manage to pull myself up and stagger to the end of the alley, getting a glance of a quiet city around me.

I didn’t get much time to enjoy the view, however. I could hear loud footsteps coming directly my way. As I turn towards the sound, I’m met with a forceful kick to the chest, knocking me back into the alleyway. My ears are ringing, my vision covered with dark spots. I narrow my eyes as I focus on the looming figure standing only a few feet away from me.

The figure is tall and exuding an aura of death, wearing midnight black armor. I assume from its form it’s female, her skin deathly white. Her hair is a dark blue, framed from her face by two horns, and a thick covering of black paint covering her eyes. The worrying part was the three pronged golden spear with a blaster on the other end that she held in her right hand, pointed down at my chest.

She smiles at me, a sight that causes dread to start building in my stomach. “Finally, the cursed Earthling who foiled Lord Thanos’ plan. You’ve been quite difficult to find; I expected more of a fight once I found you. The great golden warrior who felled the Chitauri with her amazing power. But look at you now - pathetic!” She takes several steps forward and hits me in the side with the butt end of the spear. 

I double over in pain, adopting the fetal position to protect myself further.

“There’s quite the price on you head, you know, dead or alive. Preferably alive though, and Lord Thanos will reward me greatly once I deliver you to him. Then you will wish for a release as sweet as death.”

The urge to defend myself calls Bad Wolf forward, nudging me to act.  _ “Defend yourself, Arkytior,” _ she whispers inside my head. With a deep breath, I close my eyes and let Bad Wolf emerge, embracing the feeling of energy as it raced through my body.  _ Oh God, how I’ve missed this feeling! _ I think as time slows down around me. 

The feeling is short lived, however. I lose the connection and cry out in pain, looking down to see the spear embedded in my thigh.

“In case you had any ideas about running,” the dark figure hisses.

I can feel a war bubbling within me: half of me wanting to just give in to the pain and exhaustion overwhelming my body, the other half desperately trying to focus on Bad Wolf and allow that power to overtake me. The pain was winning however, especially once the spear is forcefully pulled from my body..  _ “Speak my name, Rose. Speak my name and I can come to you.” _ With the darkness overtaking me, I did the only thing I could think of. “Loki.”

I can feel a jumble of emotions inside me, some strange and foreign and overwhelming. With them comes a single thought, just one word spoken in my mind -  _ “Rose.” _

My mumbled plea is met with dark laughter. “You call on that useless trickster for help? Fool, no one can save you now!” She raises her spear to strike again. 

_ So this is the end then? Not the way I would have thought, _ I think as I close my eyes, not wanting to watch the final blow that could end my life.

But it never comes. I feel nothing new, just the same throbbing pain radiating from my thigh and the wetness soaking into my clothes from the puddle of blood forming around me. Opening my eyes slightly, I gasp at the sight before me.

My attacker is several feet away now, using her spear to defend herself as a green and leather clad figure repeatedly strikes out with incredible speed. With a well placed backhanded hit from her own staff, he sends her flying to land sprawled on her back, the spear clattering to the ground far out of reach of her hands.

Loki turns and begins to stalk towards me, a rage and bloodlust in his eyes I’d never seen before, filling me with a renewed sense of fear. Seemingly sensing my fear, he stops in his tracks, turning his face away. “Are you afraid?”

“A little,” I reply honestly, letting out a slight whimper as I attempt to move away. I’m sitting in a pool of my own blood, my thigh ripped open and muscles showing.

“You’re injured.” His tone and demeanor softens, immediately moving to kneel by my side. “We can’t stay here, it’s not safe. We have to run, to hide.”

I barely follow his musings, wondering what has brought on the sudden need to run and hide - not typically Loki’s style. “Where are we?”

“You’re powerful, Rose, but I don’t think you could manage to leave Earth, especially not in the state you’re currently in.”

“Why do you want to hide? Are you afraid Odin will come after you?” My voice comes out slurred, the blood loss making it difficult to stay focused.

“I care not for Odin’s knowledge of my departure. I do, however, care about the events that just transpired. Do you even know the danger you are now in?” With a flick of his hands, he conjures up several bandages and wraps them around my wound.

Several minutes pass before he finally speaks again, a strange darkness appearing on his face as he lifts me up in his arms and his grip on me tightens, his voice so soft I could barely hear it. “The army I led to New York, there were given to me by Thanos. He’s incredibly powerful and dangerous, bringing death and destruction to ever civilization he touches - he and his Black Order. You met one of them just now, Proxima Midnight, his greatest warrior.”

My hand moves up to cup the side of his face, his eyes closing as he leans into it. “You saved me though.”

“I will always come back for you. When you summoned me and I saw you lying there dying - I was afraid Rose, a feeling I am unaccustomed to experiencing. It goes against the very nature of what I am. Even now, I can practically feel you fading away and I don’t quite know how to respond.” 

“I’ll be okay, I’m the queen of okay… oh no, that’s rubbish, never call me that.”

Loki stares at me intently, his gaze forcing me to look him in the eyes. “I almost lost you once before, I will not allow you to slip away, little wolf.”

“Aren’t you in danger, too? They’ll notice you’re not in prison, they’ll come after you!”

“I care not what Odin or any witless oaf on Asgard does. The safety of the woman bleeding out in my arms is my main concern. They could try to come after me, or to come after you, but it would be pointless.” He leans his head down closer, until his face is close enough I can feel each breath. “You are my weakness, Rose Tyler.” The way he rolls my name off his tongue is enough to make me shiver with desire despite the pain shooting through my leg with every step he took. “Your mere presence is enough to change all that I am, to clear my mind of all else. And if anyone was ever to take you from me, it would take more than an army or any cell to keep me from finding you again.”

A moment passes, and I’m completely unsure of how to respond to his confession. Being the emotional coward I am, I change the topic. “Why aren’t I healing like last time?”

“I suspect if you tried to use the power within you right now, you  wouldn’t be strong enough to contain it. The power that could save you would effectively kill you. That being said…”

I wince loudly as he lifts me up, cradling my body close to his. “Whatcha doin’ to me?” I mutter.

“What I have to in order to keep you alive,” he responds quietly.

Everything around me becomes blurry, my vision swimming until even the pale face above me becomes shrouded in darkness.

  
  


My eyelids flutter open and my body immediately floods with a dangerous concoction of emotions and hormones: fear, pain, and confusion all fighting for dominance. Cool hands are on my hot skin in an instance, offering safety and solace in their touch.

“You’re safe, little wolf,” a voice like silk whispers.

I whip my head in the direction of the voice, confused not to see the God of Mischief, but instead a ginger-haired man in a white dress shirt and black blazer. “Loki?” I question, no longer feeling the adrenaline rush of fight or flight, only confusion.

The ginger smirks down at me with a mischievous gleam in his stormy green eyes. “Not at the moment.”

Looking around, I recognize the small room as the Torchwood Medbay. Before I could fully understand, an all too familiar shriek filled the room. “Rose! Oh Rose, darling, you’re awake!”

The mysterious ginger backed away to make way for the older, much louder blonde. “We were so worried, you disappeared for days and looked awful when you came back. Where were you sweetheart? What happened? Who hurt you? How do you feel?”

“I don’t think screaming at her is gunna make her answer any faster, Jackie,” my best mate interrupts my mum from the doorway. 

My mum stops the endless questions and sits next to me on the small bed. “Well I’m just worried, that’s all.”

“I’ll give you all a moment and let the doctor know she’s awake,” the ginger remarks, nodding at me before slipping around Mickey and out the door.

“How you feeling, babe?” Mickey walks into the room to stand behind my mum. “You gave us all quite the scare.”

“Better, I think. Just a bit confused at the moment.” My eyes keep glancing at the door where the ginger stranger had left. “Who was that just now?”

“He brought you here, just showed up in the lobby yesterday with your bleeding self in his arms. Said you two had met before and he found you in an alley not far from here.”

“Did he say where we met?” At their confused faces, I add, “It’s all just a bit fuzzy right now.”

Mickey nods his understanding. “Said you met at a conference in Germany.”

A small smile forms on my face.  _ Leave it to the God of Lies to create a false backstory grounded in the truth. _ “Right, of course. Sorry, just forgot.”

“It’s quite alright, sweetheart. You’ve had quite the couple days. But you’re safe now, no more of that scientific jumping business.”

The small smile wipes off my face as my eyes roll back into my head. “Mum, you don’t seriously think I’m not gunna try again? We did it, it works! You think I’m gunna stop just ‘cause I got a little hurt?”

“A bit more than ‘a little hurt’ this time I’m afraid, Rose,” Doctor Campbell chimes in from the doorway, with the ginger not-quite-Loki standing behind him. The room was starting to get a little too crowded as both men stepped into the small room, Doctor Campbell next to my mum in front of me, and not-quite-Loki in his original spot near my head. Mickey stands at the other end of the room by the foot of my bed, watching everyone with a frown. “You sustained a deep laceration to your thigh, cutting through the muscle and nicking your femur. You lost a lot of blood. We stitched up the wound and gave you two liters of blood, and so far you’re showing great recovery. It may still take several weeks for your leg to heal completely though.”

“I’m not worried, I tend to heal pretty quickly.” I smirk at Mickey, but he only gives me a tight lipped smile in return.

“Yes, well, it’s not only your leg that has me worried. We did the routine Torchwood medical tests since you haven’t had a physical in quite some time, and they came back with some disconcerting results.”

“I’ll stop you right there, Doctor,” I raise my hand to interrupt, getting a sense of where this conversation was going. “I’m quite aware of my current medical situation and would not like to discuss it any further at this time, understood?”

The doctor hesitantly nods in return. “Understood, General Tyler. If you’ll excuse me, I have other matters to attend to. I’ll come back to check on you in a bit.”

Before Mickey or my mum can ask the questions I can see forming in their heads, I sit up in the hospital bed. “Mum, could you maybe get me something to eat? I’m starving.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hitting some major writers block with this story, so any suggestions, comments, etc. you lovely readers have is always welcome!


	8. Of Revelations and Conversations

The slight creak of the med bay door rouses me from my light sleep, allowing a small, dim ray of light into the otherwise dark room. I assume it’s simply Doctor Campbell checking in on me and refuse to open my eyes. Soft footsteps enter the room and close the door with a quiet click before the figure settles into the chair by my bed.

Jackie, Mick, and not-quite-Loki had left me to sleep about an hour earlier, although all were hesitant to leave me alone. I knew Jackie would stay home to tuck little Tony into bed, and Mick was probably throwing himself into his work to keep his mind occupied -  _ a trait we both share, _ I think.

That left the disguised God of Mischief. I continue breathing deeply, letting him think I was asleep. For a moment, nothing happens and I hear nothing but his slow breaths going in and out of his lungs. Just as I was considering asking him what he was doing here, his smooth voice breaks the silence.

“Of all the sad lonely souls in this universe, somehow we found each other. I have seen so many parts within, both the good and the bad, and thought I knew my place in it all. But I was wrong, and for a while I wasn’t certain about anything in my life. But you, little wolf, you are my only certainty. You have touched me in a way I never anticipated. It seems right now, that the only certain thing I have ever done in my life is making my way here to you.”

An unfamiliar feeling begins growing inside my chest, as if all of my organs were swelling slightly and pressing against my ribcage. But I don’t feel any pain, only a strange sense of contentment.  _ Maybe a side effect of the pain meds they gave me? _ I think. 

I’m startled from my inner musings as he takes my hand in his cold grasp, pressing a small kiss to my wrist. “When we met, I was broken and bleeding, desperate for a place in this unforgiving cosmos. You filled my wounds with pieces of yourself and have made me complete, possibly for the first time in my existence. The way you make me feel..for the first time it’s as if anything is possible, that there may just be some hope left for me. One day, maybe I’ll find the way to tell you, the right way to describe what I feel in this moment, what I have felt since I first laid eyes on you. For now, just know I want to be with you, for as long as I can. It may never be long enough, but I will cherish every moment I can claim.”

I stay silent for a few minutes, focusing only on the feeling of his thumb rubbing small circles on the back of my hand. Deciding to pretend I was asleep during his revelation, I let out a small moan and flutter my eyes open. “Hey there, I thought you left.” I can’t help but smile as I look into his serene face.

“Did you really think your ridiculous mother and that insolent friend of yours could keep me away after all the trouble I went through to return to you?”

“Pretty sure my mum would have lots to say if she knew who you really were. Granted, she’s sure to have lots to say when she finds out what I really am.”

“I have no doubt your mother would find it difficult to find words to say, she never has so far,” Loki mumbles.

I chuckle slightly. “You know I had to get my mouth from somewhere. Although she’s got more of a temper on her than I do. If she knew one of the most wanted men in the universe was sitting in the same room as her daughter, it might take all the staff in this facility to keep her away.”

Loki snorts, dropping my hand. “Clearly you’ve never met my mother.”

I push myself up and to the side of my bed, patting empty space next to me. He looks at me for a moment before complying, wrapping an arm around me and letting me lean my head against his chest. “You’ve never talked about your family before.”

“It’s not exactly my favorite topic,” he replies dryly.

A yawn escapes me. “You’ve heard my story Loki, only fair you tell me yours.”

He lets out a small sigh, running his fingers through my hair in a relaxing movement - although whether or not it was meant to relax me or him I don’t know. “I was adopted and raised as Thor’s brother. However, I am not originally from Asgard. I am Jotun in origin.”

“I’ve never heard of Jotuns.”

He looks away from me, staring off into the distance - assumedly remember something from his past. “Allow me to tell you a story told to Asgardian children: once, mankind accepted a simple truth: that they were not alone in this universe. Some worlds man believed to be home to their gods. Others, they knew to fear. From a realm of cold and darkness came the Frost Giants, who threatened to plunge the mortal world into a new ice age. But humanity did not face this threat alone. The Asgardian armies drove the Frost Giants back into the heart of their own world. In the end, their king fell. The source of their power was taken from them. With the last great war ended, they withdrew from the other worlds and returned home to the realm eternal - Asgard.” He speaks his home’s name with a longing I was familiar with; I did the same when talking of my home dimension or the Doctor.

Loki continues with the story. “But that wasn’t all they took from Jotunheim that day. In the aftermath of the battle, Odin went into the Temple, and found a baby. Small for a giants offspring; abandoned, suffering, left to die. It was their king’s - Laufey’s son.”

I remember back to after I’d first met Loki in Stuttgart, when Thor had pulled us both from the plane onto that mountainside.  _ “Your father! He did tell you my true parentage did he not?” _ At the time, I didn’t think much of it, but now… “You’re the baby? Odin took you to raise as his own?”

“Yes. My entire life I was lied to by those who claimed to be my family in order to ‘protect me’ because I was one of the monsters that parents tell their children about at night.” His voice cracks with hidden emotions of anger and betrayal before reverting to his typical smug expression. 

Another silent moment passes between us after he finishes his story. “I never go the chance to thank you for saving me. And for what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re a monster.”

Loki pulls me a bit closer at my words. “Has your leg healed?”

I flip the light blanket off of me and pull my leg up, sliding it up his to bring it closer. You could barely even see the little pink line that was left from the gaping wound it had been only hours earlier. “Practically gone.”

Despite my cheerful tone, his expression was serious. “Do you solely not want your mother to know of the power within you, or is there something else you wanted to keep from her today?”

My cheery demeanor fades away, my mind involuntarily flashing back to Kilgrave’s hands tracing the scar on my abdomen. “I went through a lot during that jump. I ran into something - well, someone - really disturbing before you found me. And...and for the first time I was afraid of someone seeing me. He made me show him, but I didn’t want to…” My emotions were welling up in my throat, a painful lump forming as I tried to hold back the tidal wave of fear and anger that threatened to flood my system.

The arm around me snakes lower, wrapping around my waste until his hand hovered over the literal sore spot in question. “It’s still there, isn’t it? It’s never healed?”

I can only nod in response as he removes his arm from around me and turns his whole body towards me. “I wish with all that I am I could take back what I did to you. Had I known of your self destructive tendencies at the time, I would have rethought me decision that day.”

“Jeopardy friendly, me. Bad habit I picked up along the way.” A small smile pulled the corners of my mouth upward. “If I can help someone who can’t help themselves, shouldn’t I?”

Slowly, he leans his face closer to mine, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead. “I doubt I could convince you of anything different.”

My hand finds his and our fingers lace together. A moment from my past flashes in my mind, of another man lacing his fingers with mine and looking at me happily.  _ “How long are you going to stay with me?” He asks, looking away from the dinosaurs around us on this strange planet and smiling at me. Smiling back, I reply, “Forever.” Although I look back to the amazing planet before us, I can feel his eyes still on me, smiling with joy and contentment. _

“How long are you going to stay with me?” My voice is quiet, I’m not even sure he heard me.

“Until you send me away, which I hope you never do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter, I know, but I felt you all deserved a sappy private moment with our couple!  
> Finally getting my inspiration back, so I'll hopefully be updating more often again :)  
> As always, reviews are lovely!


	9. Jackie Has Lots to Say

“YOU’RE NOT USING THAT BLOODY MACHINE AGAIN!” Jackie screeches as I finish changing from the hospital gown into my Torchwood clothes. I had anticipated this reaction when I told her I was going to jump again, although not quite this loud.

“Babe, maybe Jackie’s right. I mean, I know the drugs here a good but your leg was hurt pretty bad. Maybe you should at least take a few more days.” Great, even Mickey was against me. 

I let out a sigh. “Look, I’m fine. Doctor Campbell got me all stitched up, and the drugs worked amazing. Barely any sign of it left at all,” I lie.  _ Yeah, there’s no sign of it, but not cause of the drugs. _ “And I can’t put it off, we’re already running out of time. More and more stars are going out every day! And the longer we just sit here arguing, the less time we have to find the Doctor!”

Both grew silent at my outburst. Loki, still sporting his ginger look, was back to sitting in the chair by my hospital bed, watching the conversation with an annoying smug expression.

“And it’s not like I’m working alone. The entire Canon project team has been working to create more accurate jumps, right Mick?”

Mickey, still frowning, nods in reply.

“And we’ve got an expert in portal travels right here,” I motion to Loki, “he can help me if I need it.”

“You just bloody met this Mr….Mr…, what even is your name?” Jackie directs her annoyance to Loki, who responds without flinching.

“Sharpe, Thomas Sharpe, at your service. And your daughter is correct, I have a great deal of experience with portal travel. Also, I did not just meet her, we were just reacquainted, not under the best of circumstances to be assured, but I’m glad to have found her once again all the same.”

I can’t help but smirk as his answer leaves my mum at a loss for words, her mouth opening and closing like a fish. “See, nothing to worry about.”

“Well, I still don’t like it.” Jackie crosses her arms across her chest and pouts. 

“No offense, mum, but you don’t have to like it. I have to do this, it’s my job. Can’t you see that?” I walk out of the room to turn in my discharge papers, and of course she follows me out.

“Are the two of you sleeping together then? Is that why he hasn’t left your side since you got here?”

“Mum!” I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks and I try not to look at her.

“I mean, he’s rather nice, isn’t he? And at least this one’s human! Honestly surprised you like a ginger, and a bloke with a body like that. Always figured you’d try to find some skinny fellow like you-know-who. I guess I shouldn’t complain, it’s about time you settled down and gave me grandchildren.”

Of course, Loki and Mickey chose that moment to walk out of the room and up to us, hearing everything my mother was saying. My face burns with embarrassment, barely even able to look up at the man in question. I change the subject as fast as I can. “Alright, then. Mum - thanks for everything, but I’ve got to get to it.” With a quick stride, I leave my mum behind and make a beeline for the lift. Mick and Loki catch up easily, following me into the small space. I can see Mick smirking as the doors shut. “So did you set a date or is it just a piece of paper to you?”

I not so lightly punch my best friend in the arm. “Shut up, Mick.” 

He keeps an annoying grin even as he rubs his arm. Loki just watches me with a very slight smirk.

“Can we please just focus on making sure I don’t end up in bloody New York again?” I sigh, annoyed with them both.

“I was under the impression you liked that city?” Despite the difference in appearance, his voice still sounds the same -  _ and has the same effect on me _ , my brain reminds me.

“Yeah, I used to,” I mumble in reply. Thankfully, the elevator doors open with a ding before either can ask any further questions. I practically sprint into the work lab, avoiding talking about my feelings like always. “Right then, we’ve got lots of work to do, and it’s only just beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short one, I know, but a really long one is coming! I just felt you all deserved another update since I made you all wait so long for the first few chapters.  
> None of Loki's alternate names from the comics really worked for this story, so I just pulled from Tom Hiddleston's movie Crimson Peak. I originally thought about having him go by John Smith just to mess with their heads, but I think Mick is smart enough to pick up on that and we don't want him to figure it out just yet.


	10. Turn Left

(3 days later)

“What happened? What did they find? Sorry, did they find someone?” I’m running full speed towards the scene in front of me. UNIT is there, cleaning up the mess from the giant “star” that just rained down death from above. People thought it was a Christmas prop - blimey can humans be dull. I’d been thrown into some strange and unfamiliar universes the last few days while trying to find the Doctor; this was the first time I’d found a dimension with even a mention of the Doctor.

I come to a stop as I reach a strangely familiar woman.

“I dunno….a bloke called the doctor or something,” she replied.

“Where is he?” I continue to question this woman as I try to regain my breath.

“They took him away. He’s dead.”

My heart stops.  _ No, he can’t...he can’t be dead! I came all this way! _

“I’m sorry. Did you know him? I mean, they didn’t say his name. It could be any doctor.” 

I can’t breath. I can feel my fear rising, Bad Wolf threatening to come out as a small part of my heart breaks. “I came so far,” I mutter.

“It could be anyone,” the woman continues to try and comfort me. 

Something about her seems...off. There’s a tingling in the back of my head where Bad Wolf stays, like she’s trying to tell me something.  _ What is it about this woman? _ “What’s your name?”

“Donna. And you?”

_ There! Behind her! There’s something….Oh, crap! She asked who I am. _ “Oh, I was just passing by,” I reply. I don’t know what timeline I’ve stumbled into, it isn’t safe yet to tell anyone who I really am. “I shouldn’t even be here. This is wrong. This is wrong. This is so wrong,” I keep saying.  _ I can feel it, hear it, something behind her! _ I think as I try to look around her to see what’s making my brain go all tingly.  _ Why is this woman so familiar? _ “Sorry, what was it? Donna what?” I ask with a quick glance behind her.

“Why do you keep looking at my back?”

I quickly look away. “I’m not.”

“Yes, you are! You keep lookin’ behind me. You’re doing it now.” Donna starts turning circles trying to see what’s on her back. “What is it? What’s there? Did someone put something on my back?”

I don’t get a chance to reply as the Dimension Canon pulls me back to my dimension with a flash of blue. Unfortunately, in our rush to get the “send” portion of the canon to work, we hadn’t done quite as good a job with the “return.” Therefore, the canon dumps me at full speed back into the Torchwood testing lab - where there isn’t enough space to slow down and I go crashing face first into the cement wall.

“Oh my God...Rose! Are you alright?” Mickey’s voice shouts out.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I’ve just lost the man who once meant the world to me...and I’ve just run head first into a wall. “Didn’t see that coming,” I mumble to myself, bursting into hysterical laughter.

“Just how hard did you hit that wall?” Loki asked. He stood next to where I lay, his towering form looking down at me with a mix of confusion and amusement.

“Sorry babe, still working out the bugs,” Mickey pipes in, offering a hand to help me up.

My laughter dies down a bit as I sit up, checking to make sure the small yellow button, the canon trigger, is still in my pocket. “It should work itself out, probably just the power source. Just to be on the safe side though, I’m keeping this with me.” 

I can feel Loki’s eyes on me as I stand up. Mickey takes a few steps back. “What happened? What did you see? Did you find him?”

A fresh wave of pain runs through me, a crushing sensation in my chest that makes it hard to breathe. “Sort of? He...he....” I can’t process the words, the idea of the Doctor being dead leaving me in shock. I inhale slowly, “I didn’t find him, but we’ve got the right coordinates this time - and I think I found one of his newer companions. Something about her just seemed...familiar.” Shaking out my arms and rolling my neck, I can feel my neck and spine release a popping sound. “Ah, alright then. Reset it to the same coordinates, I’m ready to go again.”

“Rose, you need to rest. You’ve been going non-stop for 3 days now.” Mickey pleads, a worried look in his eyes. Seeing no sign of me agreeing, he turns to Loki, “Oi, Sharpe! You’re supposed to be an expert. Maybe she’ll listen to you.”

Loki just smirks at me and chuckles. “I rather doubt it. She never has before.”

I smile at him, my tongue poking out between my teeth. Having him around these last few days felt strangely... _ normal _ . It honestly wasn’t much different to how it had been before, when he’d shown up and only I could see him - except now we could talk and I didn’t look like I’d gone round the bend. I kept waiting for him to do something to cause trouble or disappear, but he never did. He was always there when I returned from a jump and was simply by my side on the rare occasions I did stop for a moment.

“Fine then, at least promise me you’ll sleep when you get back? You don’t wanna look like a zombie when we see himself again, do ya?” My best mate jokes.

The idea of seeing the Doctor, alive again, fills me with mixed feelings. I’d just seen his body rolled away, and all I could think of was Kilgrave in his place. I hid what I was thinking and forced a smile. “Sure, Mick. A quick nap when I get back.”

Before I give the command, the cannon trigger starts to beep, signaling that it was ready for another jump.

“What is that? What are you doing?” Mick asks, suddenly alarmed.

“This isn’t me…whoa!” Before I can do anything, the Dimension Canon fires, thrusting me forward until I’m running full speed out of an alley. 

“Blimey, you alright?” A woman’s voice asks when I finally come to a stop. “What was that, fireworks?”

I stare back into the alley I’d just run out of, trying to process how any of this was happening. “I dunno. I was just about to... That’s weird.”

“You’re the one,” she says. I stop looking about and face her.  _ It’s the same woman from before! _ She clearly recognizes me too. “Christmas Eve, I met you in town.”

“Donna, isn’t it?”

“What was your name?”

I ignore her question and just start to babble on, the back of my head tingling again, like something’s off, but more powerful this time. “How’re you doing? You’re looking good. How’s things? What you been up to?” I can’t help but glance behind her, the nagging feeling growing the longer we stand here. 

“You’re doing it again.”

“What?”

“Looking behind me. People keep on doing that. Looking at my back.”

_ I’m not the only one to sense it then… _ “What sort of people?”

“People in the street. Strangers. I just catch them sometimes, staring at me. Like they’re looking at something. And then I get home and I look and there’s nothing there.” Donna twitches as she tries to look at her own back, throwing her arm behind her to feel for it. “See, look? Now I’m doing it.”

I look at her again, the tingling incredibly uncomfortable now. That’s when I saw it: it looked like a giant beetle stuck to her back. It was only a glimpse, but it still takes all my effort not to react at the sight. The tingling suddenly expands, and it’s like something inside of me has broken free. I can see Donna’s timelines, drifting around her like strings of color. Two strings are glowing brighter than the rest, and if I focus….  _ I can change it, I can change time. I know what I have to do. _ “What are you doing for Christmas?”

“What am I what?” Donna says, clearly getting more annoyed by the minute.

“Next Christmas. Any plans?”

“I don’t know! That’s ages away! Nothing much, I suppose. Why?”

_ Be subtle. _ “Just, I think you should get out, you and your family,” I reply, acting nonchalant as I brush an invisible piece of dust off my jacket. “Don’t stay in London. Just leave the city.”

“What for?” she spits out.

“Nice hotel. Christmas break.”

“Can’t afford it.” She says it like it’s a saying she repeats often. I know the feeling all too well. 

I focus on another string, another timeline, seeing something from her past. “Well, no, you’ve got that raffle ticket,” I say, motioning to her pocket. 

Donna’s mood changes from angry to suspicious. “How do you know about that?”

“First prize. Luxury weekend break,” I repeat what I’d seen in her timeline. “Use it, Donna Noble.”

“Why won’t you tell me your name?” Her tone grows hostile. I don’t respond; I can’t respond. She can’t know my name.

Donna starts to walk past me. “I think you should leave me alone.” 

As she walks away, the canon lets out a little beep. Blue light flashes around me and I’m thrown back to my dimension. I manage to avoid running face first into a wall this time, instead crashing into Loki and knocking us both to the ground. 

With a twist of his wrists, the canon trigger appears in his hands. “I believe I’ll take that for the time being.”

“And just what do you think you’re doing?” I ask, my arms crossed as I stand in front of him. 

The hand not holding the trigger curls into a fist, and I can sense a darkness come over him. “I am once again going out of my way to protect you.” He takes a deep breath before continuing, “Oddly enough I have to agree with your egregious friend - you need rest. Remember what state you were in last time you strained yourself too much without rest? I don’t want to pick up your broken body off the ground again wondering if you’ve pushed yourself to the brink of death.”

I look at him hard, noting the dark circles under his eyes. “You’ve been worrying about me?” I ask softly.

“Contrary to what you might believe, I am not completely void of emotion. Something about you stirs this  _ need _ inside of me, an irrational desire to protect you.” 

I can’t hide the small smile that appears as I gently place my hand on his arm. “Contrary to what you might believe,” I say in a voice somewhat mimicking his, “emotions other than anger and rage are normal. You don’t have to hide them away with me.”

“Might I make a request of you, in the spirit of our new openness?” His mood has entirely shifted back to his normal, mischievous as always.

“I’m all ears,” I smile wider, feeling a warmness inside me as he smiles in return.

“When you do find the right world, might I accompany you? You said yourself it will be incredibly dangerous and you can’t do it alone.”

“See my old universe, facing down countless enemies, with you by my side? I can think of nothing better.”

  
  


After that, Loki and Mickey both get triggers of their own, in case they need to jump with me. 

I make several more jumps to the other dimension. I make contact with UNIT first thing; they’re hesitant at first when I refuse to give them my name, but came around once I show them my TARDIS key. Now that I had a giant organization at my disposal, I was able to start working on a way to fix time in this universe.

The next time I jump, I see Donna Noble again. It’s strange, like time is somehow revolving around her. I hadn’t been able to see anyone else’s timelines since our last encounter, I could only see hers.

With a flash of blue, I appear in the other dimension. As I got a sense of my surroundings, Donna walks around the corner, timelines floating around her. “Hello,” she says, sadness in her voice.

“Hi.” I respond, my tone completely serious. “Care to go for a walk?”

She nods her agreement and we walk in silence to a nearby clearing. I take a seat on a park bench. Donna sits on the other end and we both glance up at the darkening sky.

“It’s the ATMOS devices,” I explain. I’d learned about the new invention from UNIT on my last jump. I’d seen the obvious fatal design, but I couldn’t say anything. I had to let it happen. I understood now why the Doctor looked for timelines he could interfere with; being forced to watch events unfold that you had the knowledge to change was almost unbearable.

“We’re lucky,” I continue, “Britain hasn’t got that much petrol. But all over Europe, China, South Africa, they’re getting choked by gas.”

“Can’t anyone stop it?”

“Yeah, they’re trying right now, this little band of fighters on board the Sontaran ship. Any second now…” I say, squinting as fire erupts in the sky, burning up the smoke that had polluted this Earth’s atmosphere. 

Donna watches in shock. “And that was…?”

“That was the Torchwood team: Gwen Cooper, Ianto Jones...they gave their lives. And Captain Jack Harkness has transported to the Sontaran homeworld. There’s no one left.” 

It had taken so much willpower not to go visit Jack the instant I’d learned he was still alive. Everytime I thought about it though, Bad Wolf would pulse painfully to remind me why I couldn’t and why I couldn’t mess with this timeline. 

“You’re always wearing the same clothes,” Donna states accusingly. “Why won’t you tell me your name?”

“None of this was meant to happen,” I explain. “There was a man, this wonderful man, and he stopped it: the Titanic, the Adipose, the ATMOS...he stopped them all from happening.”

“That doctor?”

“You knew him,” I say, looking into one of her timelines.

“I did? When?”

“I think you dream about him sometimes. It’s a man in a suit,” I say, trying to hide my smile as I picture my Doctor on one of our best adventures in New New York. “Tall, thin man. Great hair. Some  _ really _ great hair.” 

“Who are you?” Donna asks again.

“I was like you. I used to be you. ‘Cause you’ve travelled with him, Donna, you travelled with the Doctor in a different world.”

“I never met him, and he’s dead!”

“He died underneath the Thames on Christmas Eve - but you were meant to be there. He needed someone to stop him, and that was you. You made him leave. You saved his life.”

A blank look covers Donna’s face, like she’s remembering something. “Stop it! I don’t know what you’re talking about. Leave me alone!” She’s shouting as she stands up and starts walking away.

“Something is coming, Donna. Something worse.” I get up to follow her, although I know my time here is almost up.

“The whole world is stinking. How could anything be worse than this?”

I take another step towards her. “Trust me. We need the Doctor more than ever. I’ve…” I hesitate, not sure how much I should tell her. “I’ve been pulled across from a different universe because every single universe is in danger. It’s coming, Donna. It’s coming from across the stars and nothing can stop it.”

“What is?” She snaps.

“The darkness.”

“Well, what do you keep telling me for?” She yells. “What. Am. I. Supposed. To. Do? I’m nothing special. I mean, I’m….I’m not...I’m nothing special. I’m a temp. I’m not even that. I’m nothing!” Donna’s almost in tears at her confession.

“Donna Noble, you’re the most important woman in the whole of creation,” I laugh. 

“Oh, don’t. Just don’t. I’m tired. I’m so tired.”

“I need you to come with me.”

“Yeah, well,” Donna chuckled, “Blonde hair might work on the men, but you ain’t shifting me, lady.” 

_ Oh, I like her! _ I smiled at her. “That’s more like it.”

“I’ve got plenty more.”

“But you’ll come with me, only when you want to.”

“You’ll have a long wait, then,” laughs Donna as she starts walking away.

“Not really, just three weeks. Tell me, does your grandfather still own that telescope?”  _ Dear lord, I sound like the Doctor! _

Donna whirls around. “He never lets go of it.”

“Three weeks’ time. But you’ve got to be certain. ‘Cause when you come with me, Donna, I’m sorry, so sorry, but...you’re going to die.”

Poor woman stared at me dumbfounded as I faded away.

  
  


The stars were disappearing on a much faster rate in this wrong dimension. After several more jumps, the device I needed to fix time was ready. All I needed was Donna.

I found her after three weeks, just like I’d said. Her and her grandfather sat in a junkyard with his telescope, beginning to panic as the stars blinked out of existence.

As if realizing the truth, Donna turns around and sees me. “I’m ready.”

Knowing what she was going to decide, I have a UNIT car waiting to take us to their base where I have my device set up.

As we walk into the closed off area, my device comes into view. Donna looks around the large space, confusion all over her face. Over the soundsystem, a voice announces: “Lodestone testing now at 15.4. Repeat, 15.4.”

Captain Magambo approaches us as I start hitting buttons on the control panel. “Ma’am,” she says with a salute.

I roll my eyes. “I’ve told you, don’t salute.”

We’d been through this routine countless times, yet she still salutes. “Well, if you’re not going to tell us your name,” she reasons. 

“What, you don’t know either?” Donna chimes in.

“I’ve crossed too many different realities,” I say with a sigh, remembering how Bad Wolf had thrown me across time in order to understand the big picture. “Trust me, the wrong word in the wrong place can change an entire causal nexus.”

Captain Magambo ignores me and addresses Donna. “She talks like that. A lot. And you must be Miss Noble.”

“Donna.”

“Captain Erisa Magambo,” the UNIT officer says as she holds out her hand. “Thank you for this.”

Donna shoots a glance at me. “I don’t even know what I’m doing.”

Finally done checking the settings on the control panel, I look at Captain Magambo. “Is she awake?”

“Seems to be quiet today. Ticking over. Like it’s waiting.”

I look at the subject in question with fondness: the deep blue 1950’s police box. My excitement at finding the Doctor’s beloved time machine under UNIT supervision was through the roof. My heart broke a little when I realized she was dying, but she would still sing for me.  _ She missed me too _ . “Do you want to see her?” I ask Donna.

“What’s a...police box?”

_ Oooh, this was going to be fun. _ “They salvaged it from underneath the Thames. Just go inside.”

“What for?”

“Just go in.” I can barely hold back my smile as Donna hesitantly walks toward the old girl. 

My face lights up when she walks through her doors. “No way!” The somber mood that had been hovering over us evaporates as she laughs at the unbelievable sight before her. 

“What do you think?” I ask when she finally reamurges. 

“Can I have a coffee?”

I laugh with her as I gently take her arm and lead her back inside the Tardis. “Time and Relative Dimension in Space. This room used to shine with light. I think she’s dying.” I reach a hand out to stroke the time rotor and the Tardis hums in response. “She’s still trying to help.”

“And it belonged to the Doctor?”

“He was the a Time Lord, the last of his kind.”

“But if he was so special, what was he doing with me?”

_ Do all of his companions feel this insecure before the Doctor? _ “He thought you were brilliant.”

“Don’t be stupid,” she scoffs.

“But you are! It just took the Doctor to show you that, simply by being with him. He did the same to me, to everyone he touches.” I can’t help but remember how good it felt to run from some alien planet, my hand in his, crazy grins on both our faces.

Donna tilts her head and looks at me intensely. “Were you and him…”

I look up at her; it’s so tempting to just open up to this woman, but I stay quiet. The tingling in the back of my brain shocks me back to reality as I remember the thing on her back. “Do you want to see it?”

“No,” she replies without hesitation, but seems to change her mind after. “Go on then.”

Using the power of the Tardis, the device I’d been creating with UNIT can show Donna the creature that’s become part of her. She stands in the middle of a large circle of wires, mirrors, lights, and equipement. Once powered on, we can all clearly see the large insect-like creature clinging onto Donna’s back. “What is it?” Poor woman sounds terrified.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have an exact answer for her. “We..don’t know.”

“Oh, thanks!”

“It feeds off time,” I explain what I know, “by changing time, by making someone’s life take a different turn. Like, uh, meetings never made, children never born, a life never loved. But with you it’s…”

“But I never did anything important!” She shouts.

“Yeah, you did. One day that thing made you turn right instead of left.”

Donna’s fully panicking now, almost hyperventilating in her attempt to hold back her tears. “When was that?”

“You wouldn’t remember, it was the most ordinary thing in the world. But by turning right, you never met the Doctor and the whole world just changed around you.”

“Can you get rid of it?”

Sadly, I nod my head. “I can’t even touch it. Seems to be in a state of flux.”

“What. Does that. Mean?” 

A smile creeps onto my face. “I don’t know. Sort of thing the Doctor would say,” I reply with a laugh.

Donna didn’t find it as funny. “You liar!” She screams, my smile fading as her emotional meltdown that had been brewing finally spilled out. “You told me I was special! But it’s not me, it’s this thing! I’m just a host!”

“No, there’s more than that,” I reassure her. “The reading’s are strange. It’s like reality is just bending around you.”

She’s still hysterical. “Because of this thing!” 

“No, no, we’re getting separate readings from you. And they’ve always been there, since the day you were born.”

Captain Magambo has been hovering behind me during our whole conversation. “This is not relevant to the mission,” she says in a low voice.  

I keep looking at Donna, trying to find a way to show her just how truly important she was. “I thought it was just the Doctor we needed, but it’s the both of you - the Doctor and Donna Noble. Together. To stop the stars from going out.”

“Why?” Donna cries. “What can I do?”

There won’t be any calming her down while she can still see the creature on her back. “Captain?” I say, knowing my tone implies what I want.

“Power down,” Captain Magambo orders, immediately followed by the device shutting down.

Slowly, I walk into the circle of the device, reaching out to Donna. Sometimes all people need is to know someone cares. She’s shaking as I gently put my hand on her arm. “It’s still there though. What can I do to get rid of it?”

My smile returns as I answer. “You going to travel back in time. The Tardis has tracked down the moment of intervention: Monday the 25th, one minute past ten in the morning. Your car was on Little Sutton Street, leading to the Ealing Road, but you turned right, heading towards Griffin’s Parade. You need to turn left. That’s the most important thing. You’ve got to go back, turn left. Have you got that, Donna? You’ve got to go back, make yourself turn left, heading for the Chiswick High Road. 

Captain Magambo approaches us with the special vest I designed. “Keep the jacket on at all times. It’s insulation against temporal feedback.” Holding up a bulky metal watch she continues to explain, “This will correspond to local time wherever you land.”

About half an hour later, everything was set and ready to go as I walked Donna back to the device, stopping just outside the circle. “This is where we leave you.”

“I don’t want to see that thing on my back,” she says, suddenly sounding panicked as she motions to the mirrors within the circle.

“No, the mirrors are just incidental. They bounce Chronon Energy back into the center which we control and decide the destination.”

“It’s a time machine.”

I smile at the woman in front of me. “It’s a time machine!”

“If you could,” Captain Magambo urges, prompting Donna to step inside the circle, as Magambo announces, “Powering up!”

“How do you know it’s gunna work?” Donna asks me.

“Hmmm?” I question, not anticipating that question. “Oh, yeah, we...we don’t. We’re just guessing.”

Donna actually laughs at that. “Brilliant!”

“Just remember,” I reiterate, “when you get to the junction, change the car’s direction by one minute past ten.”

“How do I do that?”

“That’s up to you.”

“Well...I’ll just have to run up to myself, and...have a good argument.”

I chuckle. “I’d like to see that.” 

“Activate lodestone,” Captain Magambo orders, prompting the machine to whirr to life.

“Good luck,” I wish Donna. In the short time that I’d spent with her, I’d rather grown to like this woman. “When you see him, tell him this - two words: Bad Wolf,” I say. She looks confused but nods her understanding.

“Activate!” Magambo yells, and with a surge of energy from the Tardis, the device floods the circle with light and Donna disappears.

With one last look at the Tardis, I pull out canon trigger and press the button to go home.


	11. Of Volunteers and Waiting

With a  _ pop _ and a flash of blue, I reappear back in Pete’s world. “Right then, this is where it gets complicated,” I say as I get my bearings. It has taken many, many jumps, but I have finally adjusted to the strange falling feeling and could land without running into walls or falling over.

Mickey stands a few feet away, dressed in his usual Torchwood gear. His arms are crossed over his chest and a concerned look covers his face. “It’s done then? You fixed time?”

I smile over at my best friend, but unlike normal, he didn’t smile back. “I just fixed a timeline in another universe, but it’s the step we needed, so lighten up would ya?” His mouth twitches slightly, but he still looks upset about something. Glancing around, I realize something is off. “Hey, where’s L-Tom? He’s always here when I get back.” I desperately hope he didn’t catch my slip up.

Mickey uncrosses his arms and takes a few steps towards me. “That’s what I’m worried about, babe. He’s been disappearing everytime you jump lately, reappearing just in time for when you get back. I don’t trust him Rose.”

A small laugh escapes me. “Mick, you don’t trust anyone outside of Torchwood. And I never expected you to trust him. You could stop giving each other death glares all the time though, that’d be rather nice.”

“Can’t make any promises there, makes me feel better.” He finally cracks a smile. “Just be careful will ya? I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

My smile melts away as I take in the worry from the man in front of me. Ten years later and I think he still has some semblance of romantic feelings towards me. 

“Do you have any idea where he wandered off too?”

“Right behind you, little wolf.” My eyes roll when I hear his deep, smooth voice behind me, shock soon taking its place as I turn around and take in the sight before me.

I still wasn’t used to his disguise, still expecting the raven-haired leather wearing version. Today he wore a navy suit over a white shirt with the top buttons left undone to show off some of his chiseled chest.

“I...um...hi…” was all I manage to blurt out. 

With a mischievous smile, he steps up to me and places a hand on my waist. “I apologize for my absence. I lost track of time when I stepped out for some fresh air.”

Mickey scoffed next to me before muttering, “Lost track of time my ass…” 

Loki’s face darkens as he shifted his gaze to Mickey, his eyes narrowing in anger. Mickey glares right back. “You can smell the testosterone,” I mumble.

Breaking Loki’s gaze, Mick turns to me. “I’ll see ya later, babe, I’ve gotta go make sure my plasma gun is ready to go. Got a feeling I’ll need it soon.”

Turning my attention back to the handsome god happily standing completely within my personal space, I say, “So how long with this,” I motion to all of him, “I’ll admit I kinda miss the leather.”

“My usual form is slightly too recognizable, and I don’t trust your idiot friend not to call S.H.I.E.L.D. and have my wit-less brother alerted to my presence here. Asgard is on the brink of panic as it is; the All-father is clueless as to why stars throughout the nine realms are disappearing from existence. It’s all rather entertaining to behold really.”

I can feel a blush spreading over me at the intensity of his gaze, but I’m jolted out of mental images of the annoying yet sexy god in front of me and brought back to reality as a shrill voice pierces through the normal background noise. “Rose, where are you?”

My eyes widen and I push Loki back away from me as my mum walks into the testing lab. “What the hell is she doing here?” I whisper harshly.

“Oh, there you are, sweetheart. Your father said you’d be here. I haven’t seen you in days. You know, you really should stop by the house more…”

“Mum, what’re you doing here?” I interrupt. 

“Mickey said you were getting ready to go back to the Doctor. I’m going with you of course!”

All I can do is blink. “Sorry, what?” Loki stays silent next to me. He’d learned quickly that Jackie was easily one of the most threatening things on Earth. “Mum, what’re you talking about?”

“If you think that I’m just going to let you jump back there by yourself, you’ve got another thing coming missy. I almost lost you last time these bloody yellow buttons were involved and I ain’t gunna lose you this time.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to quell the headache that I can feel coming. “But what about Tony? What if something goes wrong? He’s only five,you can’t just leave him!”

“Well then, you’d better make sure we both get back here safely! Now where’s Mickey, he promised me one of those very big guns he’s so fond of…” Jackie says as she wander out of the testing lab.

“If the darkness doesn’t kill me first, the Doctor sure will when I bring my mum back on the Tardis,” I mutter once she’s out of the room.

Just then, my phone buzzes, signaling a text. Discreetly pulling it out, I smile at the picture that appears on my screen: Steve Rogers sitting at a table eating chips. Beneath it is a short text:

 

**Rose, I think I’m starting to understand your obsession with these. Hope to see you soon - Steve**

 

Taking one more look at the photo, I return to the contact screen before slowly moving to slide it back into my pocket. My subtle attempt to hide my phone didn’t go unnoticed by the god standing by my side. “Why must you use coded names to identify individuals on your device?” He asks as he leans over my shoulder to read my screen. 

“This phone contains some of the most advanced technology in the universe. I’m simply protecting those whose information it contains.”

He plucks in from my grasp with deft hands, scrolling through my contacts list and reading them off. “Rickey, Narcissist, Irish, Vitex, Prentice, Cap, Grumpy...the Doctor.” His tone went from amused to bitter with one name. “Guess it shouldn’t be a surprise you’d still have that one,” he spit out.

I could sense a fight brewing, as it always seemed to at mention of the Doctor. Although normally his mischievous self, he would become tense and closed off every time the Doctor came up. The last conversation we’d had on the subject ended as more of a yelling match.

“Do we have to do this right now?” I sigh. “We make the final jump tomorrow and there’s still things to be done…”

His strong fingers wrap around my arm, leading me out of the testing lab and into an empty room. The new look I had just started to grow accustomed to melts away in a shimmer of gold. He stands before me with his long raven hair and green and gold Asgardian armor - tall, dark, and intimidating. “Does my presence here truly mean so little to you that you brush me aside for the one who abandoned you?” He hisses down at me. 

“You bloody well know!” I practically shout back at him. I can feel the rage and hurt running through me at his accusation. “I have made repeated attempts to be that person you need. I have opened up to you about every part of my past and only gotten a glimpse of yours in return. You should know I wouldn’t just leave you behind! You should know how I bloody well feel!” 

“Oh, do I? You refused my offer to rule at my side - twice I might add. You almost let me kill you by jumping in front of my scepter. And ever since I returned to save your sorry life, all you care about is returning to your precious Doctor! Have you forgotten what he did to you? Have you forgotten what your life was like before I came into it? You were broken, withering away, and I wanted you anyways. You mean everything to me, Rose; what do I mean to you?”

His confession left me speechless. His face drains of color, an expression of regret taking over as he breaks my gaze and takes several steps away. 

My mind was reeling.  _ He was right _ , I can’t help but think. _ He has given up so much for me, and how had I repaid him?  _ I realize just then that I was as bad as the Doctor at hiding my feelings; a side effect of trying to be him for six years.

“You’re right,” I say, practically a whisper. “I’m genuinely crap at expressing how I feel. I...I closed myself off when I got here, thought it would hurt too much to feel again, and I was right. I’m afraid Loki, afraid I’m going to lose part of my heart again. And I don’t think I could survive the loss a second time.”

Slowly, I take a step closer, stepping into his space and putting my hands on his chest, staring down at my shoes, too afraid to see him reject me. “You have saved me, countless times and in more ways than you know. I didn’t believe what I heard you say back in the hospital, because how could you want to stay with something so broken?” 

Gently, his fingers cup my chin and force me to look up at him. I had expected to see anger or disappointment, but instead was faced with eyes full of hope. “I know what it feels like, little wolf, to question all that you are and where you belong. You belong at my side, and I aim to make certain you will never be unsure of this fact.” He leans down so that he whispers in my ear, an action that never fails to send shivers down my spine. “There is nowhere you can run, nowhere you can hide, nowhere you can ever escape me. You are mine, and I have no intentions of ever letting you go.”

My arms wrap around his neck as I draw his mouth to mine. He steps forward, pulling off my jacket as we move and pushing me until I roughly bump against the wall, forcing the air from my lungs. One hand tangles in my hair at the back of my neck, the other making its way down my stomach and slipping past the waistline of my pants until reaching that little bundle of nerves.

My hips buck against his hand, my body instantly reacting to his touch. His fingers move lower, past my lower lips to my center but staying just outside of where I need them. “So wet for me already, little wolf? When I’m done with you, you’ll be begging for your release, desperate for it. But first, I want you to admit it - admit that you are mine, to know that your pleasure comes at the hands of Loki.”

Slowly, he inserts one finger inside me, pumping it in and out. My fingers dive into his hair, pulling him closer until I feel his lips on mine, letting his tongue plunder mine. I let out a moan as he adds another finger inside me. My knees start to go week as he curls his digits inside me, hitting that rough spot that sends extra bits of pleasure coursing through me. 

“Tell me you want me!” He growls, his other hand moving to palm my breast. 

“Yes!” I moan in reply.

“Yes what? Be specific, dear,” he says, an evil grin playing across his features.

Before I can answer, he adds a third finger, his thumb rubbing my clit as he pumps in and out. I can feel my orgasm building, so close to tipping over that edge….

“Loki, wait, stop,” I whimper. He slowly removes his hand, a confused and hurt expression taking over. Before he withdraws into himself completely, I grab both of his hands in mine. “Believe me, I want to. But there are things that need to be said first, emotions that need to be expressed.”

“Things that need to be said? Have I not expressed enough to you?” Although most of the hurt has drained from his face, the confusion remains.

“Look, just respect me on this, will ya? It’s been years since I’ve actually  _ been _ with someone. I don’t want to just jump in like two horny teenagers.”

Sighing, he pulls my hands from his and reassumes his ginger disguise with a slight golden glow. “As you wish, little wolf.”


	12. Stolen Earth

“Prime jump in 30 minutes,” calls a voice over the loudspeaker of the Torchwood building. The place was abuzz with nervous excitement for the final jump to the Prime Universe - the Doctor’s universe. The darkness had taken over double the area it had occupied in the last 24 hours, and this was our only chance to stop it.

The final jump would consist of more than just me this time. After a loud and lengthy argument, I would be making the jump along with Mickey, my mum, and Loki. Mickey looks thrilled this morning, cleaning off his magna gun with a ready expression. Jackie stood off to the side with Pete and Tony, giving detailed instructions on what to do if she wasn’t home in time for Tony’s bedtime. Loki hovers near me, looking restless as he fiddles with the handgun he’d picked out earlier.

“You’re probably going to need more than just a handgun where we’re going. What we might face…” I said, turning to look at him as memories of facing down the daleks and cybermen sprang to my mind. I motion towards the armory, “This is a different kind of battle than you’re probably used to. You’re going to need a more high-tech gun. We’re all taking magna guns, just in case.”

Loki simply looks at me for a moment before replying with a smirk, “Anything can be killed, little wolf. The size of the weapon does not decide the outcome. But for your sake, I’ll look again for anything that piques me interest.” With a wink, he casually walks over to the armory.

Alone for a few minutes, I took the opportunity and sidled over to Mickey. “Promise me you’ll keep her safe, yeah?”

He stops wiping off his gun and looks at me. “What?”

“Jackie,” I reply, glancing over at my mum and brother. “You have to promise to look after her. No matter what, she has to come home. I won’t let Tony grow up without a parent, without his mother. So I need you to stay with her the whole time, and if things go south, bring her home, even if it means leaving me behind. You got that?”

“Rose, I’m not gunna leave you behind…”

My voice drops and my tone becomes deadly serious. “Yes you will, if it comes down to her or me, you get her home. I can take care of myself, yeah? Do this for me, Mick. Please?”

“Yeah, babe. I got it,” he nods. “Same applies to your shadow?”

“Just look after my mum, I’ll keep track of Tom. We’re jumping through first, you and Jackie following close behind.”

“Why’re we splittin’ up? Wouldn’t it be better to stay together?”

“We have a better chance of finding the Doctor if we split up. Good luck, Mick.” I place a gentle hand on my best friend’s arm, giving him a slight smile before walking over to my family. Tony meets me halfway, practically jumping into my arms. I hug his small frame, a large smile on my face. “Oh my, lots of love today huh?”

“Are you going to find the Doctor?” he asks.

I set him back down on his feet, crouching down so we were eye level. “Yeah, Tony. Me,  Uncle Mickey, mum, and my friend Tom are going to go find him.”

Tony gets a pitiful look, the one he got when he wants something. “Can I go with you?”

I let out a soft chuckle as I stood up. “Sorry, Tony. Not this time. You’re still a little too young for dimension hopping yeah? Leave it to your fantastic older sister.”

Tony’s attention shifts to something behind me. “You’ll take care of Wose, won’t you Mr. Tom?”

In answer, Loki slides an arm around my waist, pulling me against him. “Do not worry about your dear sister, young one. I will always protect her, you have my word.”

Tony seems satisfied by the answer, nodding before turning back to his parents. “Prime jump in 15 minutes,” the voice calls out over the loudspeaker again.

“Are you sure about this, little wolf?” Loki whispers in my ear. His lips brush against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine.

“Too late to find a new career now. ‘Defender of Earth and Protector of Time’ are kinda non-negotiable positions for me at this point. Risks are just part of the job.”

“And you’re okay with that? Dying? Simply because it’s part of a job forced upon you? You didn’t choose this.”

Turning around to face him fully, I give him a slightly saddened look. “It may not have been my first choice to have a piece of the Time Vortex living inside me, but I’m glad it’s me. Before the...the Doctor, I was just another one of those ‘simpering humans’ you look down on. I may be putting my own life on the line, but in doing so I am saving lives, being more than simply a cog in the economic machine. It may not have been my choice, but I’m glad it’s me.

“Prime jump in 10 minutes.”

Taking a deep breath, I tore myself from Loki’s gaze, taking his hand in mine as I walk over to where our small jump group was waiting. They all look to me as I approach, and I realized that I was expected to take charge. “Right then, Mr. Sharpe and I will jump first; Mum, you and Mickey will jump second, following us by 5 minutes our time. Our main goal is to find the Doctor. We don’t know what, or who, we’re up against, so prepare for the worst. We’ve each got a magna gun, but only use them if absolutely necessary.” I look at Loki with this last statement, knowing he wasn’t accustomed to Torchwood’s boundaries. “Each of your triggers has a timer on it, alerting you to when you can make the next jump. It works through a neural interface; Control has programmed it to get us there, but we can make smaller jumps once there. Just think about where you need to go and press the button. Any questions?”

No one speaks, no one has to. Everyone but Loki knows what we could be going up against. “Triggers ready? On three then… 1… 2…  Allons-y!” I say, a small smile on my face at the thrill ahead and the now familiar feeling of falling through space.

After six years, I was finally home.

With a flash of blue light and a _pop_ , Loki and I appear in the Prime universe, frightening a poor milkman with our sudden existence. Loki brushes imaginary dirt off his leather robe, running his hand over his raven hair. I can’t help but smirk and watch, happy to see him back to his normal self.

“That’s certainly new,” Loki mumbles next to me, looking up at the sky.

I look up as well, taking in the sight. Even though it was supposed to be the middle of the day, it was dark as night all around. The sun was gone, with countless unknown planets in the sky. “Right, now we’re in trouble,” I say, switching on the magna gun, “and it’s only just beginning.”

I lead Loki down the streets of London, full of people panicking and rioting. No one even notices the two of us, too concerned with the blare of alarms as shops are being broken into, looters running up and down the street in a mad panic. Cars careen dangerously around corners the with drunk and crazed drivers and people screaming out their windows. An intoxicated man turns to us as we pass by, “It’s the end of the world, darlin’! The end of the stinkin’ world!”

I stay where I am, hoping he doesn’t try to engage and just move on. “Have one on me, mate.” My reply satisfies him as he continues on down the street. “He’s not here. I should be able to feel the Tardis, but I can’t. We need to find a way to contact him, we need to find Donna,” I mumble and continue walking through the pandemonium.

“The bright lure of freedom diminished by a mad scramble for power,” Loki comments, a familiar twinkle in his eye and slight grin on his face as he surveys the chaos all around us.

The sound of another shop window being shattered draws our attention as another alarm rings out. With a pointed look at Loki, I walk over to the shop -some electronics shop called Megabyte City - and find two teenagers stealing computers and televisions.

“Right, you two. You can put that stuff down or run for your lives.” I cock the magna gun, a high pitched hum signaling it’s readiness to shoot. “Do you like my gun?”

The teenagers flee the shop, terror covering their faces as they pass Loki to reach the door. I notice one laptop showing familiar data and kneel down in front of it. The screen shows the Earth among the other planets, a large red blob in the middle of it all. Several smaller red dots are moving towards the Earth. Loki notices my concerned look, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. “That looks like a ship,” he says, pointing to the large red blob.

“And they’re making their way to Earth, fast,” I reply, worry flooding my thoughts as the screen changed, an alert for in incoming signal blinking into existence. My worry turns to fear as the soundwaves play a cry that once haunted my nightmares, ringing out through the night.

“Exterminate. Exterminate. Exterminate.” The robotic cry sounds. I can feel Bad Wolf nudging at my mind, sensing my fear but ready for battle.

Standing up, my hand reaches out, only to be enveloped in Loki’s strong grasp. Together, we exit the shop, neither even flinching as the dalek ships start firing at random down onto the Earth. “They’re going to come down out of their ships next. It’s their typical battle plan.”

“I’ve got to admit, they may lack style and creativity, but they certainly do inspire a certain level of fear among the humans,” Loki says next to me, watching with interest at the flying saucers hovering in the sky. “I take it that ‘Earth’s mightiest heroes’ do not exist in this world?”

“The Doctor is the protector of this world, superheroes only exist in fiction here.” I look around at our surroundings. “Hold on, I know this area. This is where she lived, where Donna Noble lived, that woman I saw in the other universe.” I pick up the pace, coming to a complete stop and ducking around a corner as I hear the daleks nearby.

A dalek squadron moves down the street before us, rounding up humans. Loki looks at them with narrowed eyes. “What are these creatures?”

“They’re squid-like beings, encased in a bonded polycarbide shell called dalekanium. All emotion but hated gets ripped out of them. Com’on, there’s nothing we can do here,” I say sadly, quietly moving to the next street, where a lone dalek has two familiar looking people cornered, one an elderly man and the other a middle aged woman. The man holds a paintball gun, having shot at the dalek’s singular eyestalk. I had to give him credit for trying.

It barely stopped the monster for more than a few seconds.“My vision is not impaired.”

“I warned you, Dad!” The woman wines next to her father.

I hold up my magna gun, aiming it at the dalek in anticipation of what I know will happen next.

“Hostility will not be tolerated,” the dalek declares. “Exterminate. Exterminate. Exter…” It never gets to finish as its head explodes in a shower of sparks and metal debris. The two humans look up and see me and Loki standing behind the now-dead monster.

The old man holds his gun out to me. “Do you want to swap?”

“You’re Donna Noble’s family, right? I’m Rose Tyler, and we need your help.”

  


Wilf, as Donna’s grandfather introduced himself, led us back to his home, Donna’s mother Sylvia in tow. Wilf was very pleased upon hearing that I had traveled with the Doctor as well. Neither seemed fond of Loki, casting very skeptical looks his way.

“Yeah, I’ve tried calling her, but I can’t get through. But she’s still with the Doctor, I know that much, and the last time she phoned, it was from a planet called Midnight, made of diamonds,” Wilf explains when I ask if he had gotten in contact with Donna.

Wilf might have believed everything that Donna had told him, but her mother seemed slightly more skeptical. “What the hell are you all on about?”

“Look, she’s out there, sweetheart. Your daughter. She’s traveling the stars with that Doctor. She always has been.”

“Don’t be ridiculous!” Sylvia scoffs. Loki makes himself comfortable on their couch as they continue shouting at each other. I take a seat at their table, patiently waiting for the two older adults to stop shouting.

“Oh, come on, open your eyes! Look at the sky. Look at...look at the daleks! You can’t start denying things now!”

“You’re my last hope. If we can’t find Donna, we can’t find the Doctor,” I chime in, getting them both to pipe down.

The silence is broken by a strange beeping noise coming from the family’s computer. I dash over to it, finding the screen covered in static. “Can anyone hear me? The Subwave Network is open. You should be able to hear my voice. Is anyone there?”

“I know that voice,” I mumble. Loki leans forward where he sits, watching me intently.

“Can anyone hear me? This message is of the utmost importance. We haven’t much time. Can anyone hear me?” The static begins to lessen, revealing a video call with none other than former Prime Minister Harriet Jones. “Captain Jack Harkness, shame on you!” She suddenly says. “Now stand to attention, sir.”

“Oh, we’re not the only ones then, are we?” I ask no one in particular.

Harriet flips open her ID and holds it up. “Harriet Jones, former Prime Minister.”

“Harriet, it’s me! It’s me,” I say to the screen, but didn’t get a reply. “Oh, she can’t hear me. Have you got a webcam?” I turn and ask Wilf.

He points to Sylvia as if to point blame. “No, she wouldn’t let me. She said they’re naughty.”

Sighing, I reply, “I can’t speak to her then, can I?”

On screen, Harriet began pressing buttons, making the screen split into four sections. “Sarah Jane Smith, 13 Bannerman Road.”

As she spoke, one corner of the screen revealed the Doctor’s oldest and dearest companion, Sarah Jane Smith. “Yeah, yeah, I’m here! That’s me!”

“Good. Now. Let’s see if we can talk to each other,” Harriet continues, pressing a final button so another section of the screen popped to life, revealing Captain Jack Harkness. “The fourth contact seems to be having some trouble getting through.”

“That’s me. Harriet, that’s me!” I call out, but to no avail.

“I’ll just boost the signal,” she says, and within moments the final section of the screen reveals a woman I didn’t recognize.

“Hello?” the unknown woman says.

Jack apparently knew however. “Ha, ha! Martha Jones!”

“Who’s she? I want to get through,” I whine. I can feel Loki’s presence behind me, watching my reactions intently..

For the moment, all I could do was watch my old friends talk to each other. “Martha, where are you?” Jack asks.

“I guess Project Indigo was more clever than we thought. One second I was in Manhattan, next second...maybe Indigo tapped into my mind, because I ended up in the one place that I wanted to be. But then all of a sudden, it’s like the laptop turned itself on.”

Harriet nodded. “It did. That was me.” Once again she holds up her ID. “Harriet Jones, former Prime Minister.”

I chuckle slightly at Martha’s response of, “Yes, I know who you are.”

“I thought it was about time we all met, given the current crisis,” Harriet continues. “Torchwood, this is Sarah Jane Smith.”

“I’ve been following your work. Nice job with the Slitheen,” Jack complements.

“Yeah, well, I’ve been staying away from you lot. Too many guns,” Sarah Jane replies, nodding towards the teenager standing next to her.

“All the same,” Jack says with a smirk, “might I say, looking good, ma’am?”

Sarah Jane blushes. “Really? Oooh.”

I roll my eyes, as does Harriet. “Not now, Captain. And Martha Jones, former companion to the Doctor.”

“Oi, so was I!” I complain again, my words unable to break through into the conference.

“But how did you find me?” Martha asks.

“This, ladies and gentlemen, this is the Subwave Network. A sentient piece of software programmed to seek out anyone and everyone who can help contact the Doctor.”

“What if the Daleks can hear us?” Martha chimes in.

“No, that’s the beauty of the Subwave. It’s undetectable.”

“And you invented it?” Sarah Jane asks.

“I developed it. It was created by the Mister Copper Foundation.” So much had changed in the six years I had been gone, so much I didn’t know about anymore.

“Yeah, but what we need right now is a weapon,” Jack adds. “Martha, back there at UNIT, what...what did they give you? What was that key thing?”

Martha holds up what looks like an oversized computer chip. “The Osterhagen key.”

“That key is not to be used, Doctor Jones,” Harriet almost shouts, her voice suddenly commanding, “not under any circumstances.”

Jack continues to press for information. “But _what is_ an Osterhagen key?”

“Forget about the key,” Harriet says in the same tone. “That’s an order. All we need is the Doctor.”

“Only, excuse me, Harriet, but...well the thing is, if you’re looking for the Doctor, didn’t he depose you?” Sarah Jane asks as politely as she could.

I remember back to that Christmas, the first Christmas with the Doctor’s new face. He had just regenerated, a completely different man, yet still the Doctor. With six words he had deposed Harriet Jones from power after she blew up the Sycorax ship.

Harriet looks sad as she answers. “He did. And I’ve wondered about that for a long time, whether I was wrong. But I stand by my actions to this day, because I knew...I knew that one day, the Earth would be in danger, and the Doctor would fail to appear. I told him so myself, and he didn’t listen.”

 

“But I’ve been trying to find him. The Doctor’s got my phone on the Tardis, but I can’t get through,” Martha butts in. _Blimey, does she ever stop interrupting?_

“Clearly your stubborn side comes from more than just your mother,” Loki mumbles behind me.

The corners of my mouth turned up at Loki’s comment before I began talking to the screen again. “Nor me, and I was here first.”

As I assumed, Harriet still didn’t hear me. “That’s why we need the Subwave. To bring us all together. Combine forces. The Doctor’s secret army.”

My back immediately stiffens at her comment, glancing behind me at Loki and watching all expresion leaving his face. He looks at me, suspicion in his eyes. “The Doctor’s secret army? His soldiers creating weapons? Rose, you…”

“He didn’t do it on purpose,” I cut him off, knowing what he was about to say.

Back on the screen, a new individual had stepped into view next to Jack. “Excuse me, sorry. Hello. Ianto Jones. Er, if we start transmitting, then this Subwave Network is going to become visible. I mean to the Daleks.”

Harriet gave the man a gentle smile. “Yes, and they’ll trace it back to me. But my life doesn’t matter. Not if it saves the Earth.”

Behind me, Wilf points to the screen with a proud expression. “Marvellous woman. I voted for her.”

“You did not!” Sylvia corrects harshly.

Harriet begins pressing buttons on her end. “Now, enough of words, let’s begin.” Over the other screens, I can see each of the other companions doing their part to find the Doctor.

“Oi, you two, start ringing this number and don’t stop,” I say, turning around to the Nobles and handing them the Doctor’s number.

In Jack’s corner of the screen, Ianto Jones pops back into view. “Harriet, a saucer’s locked onto your location. They’ve found you.”

Harriet continues pressing keys. “I know. I’m using the network to mask your transmission. Keep going.” The sound of the dalek battle cry and an explosion come from the screen. “Captain, I’m transferring the Subwave Network to Torchwood. You’re in charge now. And tell the Doctor from me, he chose his companions well. It’s been an honor.”

“Harriet, no…” I watch with open eyes as Harriet stands up to face the daleks that had entered behind her. I turn away at the last second, hearing that fateful blast hit her like a beam of light, killing the former Prime Minister.

Her corner of the screen fades to static. I knew this was not the time to grieve, that I could mourn her properly after we found the Doctor. Figuring Torchwood was my best bet, I began thinking of the fastest way to get to Cardiff, only for my Doctor and Donna to appear on the screen moments later.  

“Where the hell have you been?” Jack shouts. “Doctor, it’s the Daleks.”

Everyone starts talking at once in excitement. My eyes are glued to the screen, taking in a sight I thought I’d never see again. My joy at finally finding him is ruined by flashes of Kilgrave taking his place and smiling at me with that smirk. My emotions were at war with themselves inside me: happiness, anger, excitement, sorrow...it was all so confusing.

The Doctor glances around the screen with a smile. “Look at you all, you clever people.”

Donna starts pointing people out. “That’s Martha! And who’s he?” She specifically points to Jack.

“Captain Jack,” the Doctor answers. “Don’t. Just don’t.”

“It’s like an outer space Facebook!” Donna exclaims. It was nice to see her smile; when I’d met her in the alternate reality, she was depressed and miserable with life. Then again, I knew first-hand how amazing a difference the Doctor could make.

“Everyone except Rose,” the Doctor adds, his smile faltering for a second.

I can feel my emotions getting the better of me, slowly losing what control I had over keeping a battle-eager Bad Wolf at bay. Standing up, I quickly make my way out of the room, needing some space. Loki follows right behind, putting his hands firmly on my arms. “Breathe little wolf, I know you don’t want to hurt these people by losing control.”

I take a deep breath, nodding as I unclench my fists. “I’m fine. I know where they are now. We should go.” Walking back into the other room, I sling my gun over my shoulders. “Right, we’re going to find him. Wish us luck.”

“Oh, good luck,” Sylvia cries, sounding sincere for the first time.

Wilf sounded genuine as well. “Yeah, good luck, sweetheart.”

“Just think about me,” I tell him. He nods at me, then we both press our triggers, disappearing from the Noble’s living room with a bright flash and reappearing in an empty street. Immediately after we land, I can hear a familiar humming in my mind - the song of the Tardis letting me know she was near. Turning to Loki, his gaze was fixated on something behind me with a look he typically only reserved for the Avengers or Mickey, his hands tightening on his own gun.

Turning around to see what might be causing his, I see why. Or more specifically, I see _him_. The Doctor, standing next to his Tardis, looking directly at us with a hopeful expression on his face. Donna stands behind him with a content smile.

I couldn’t resist the large smile that overtook my face at finally seeing him again in person. The real him, not some copy the universe created to torment me. He takes a tentative step in my direction, quickly picking up speed as he breaks into a complete run towards me. My feet begin moving me towards him, leaving a bitter Loki standing there as I run towards my Doctor.

As I get near him, time slows down, just as it did back on the S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier when Loki made his escape. Everything around me looked like it was moving through water. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see it, what had triggered my time reflexes: a singular dalek, it’s eyestalk rotating from me to the Doctor. Time returns to normal just as it fires, giving me enough time to jump in front of the Doctor, allowing the dalek laser to strike my side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me for taking so long to update. I went on spring break, then immediately got the flu and was suddenly behind on everything. I've just now managed to catch back up. Hoping to have the next chapter up either this weekend or early next week sometime.

**Author's Note:**

> Did you miss me?  
> I have no timeline for when I'll be able to post updates, and I'm not able to write as often as I used to. But don't worry, I'll keep working at it and post as often as I can!  
> As always, I love your comments, so feel free to leave me your thoughts, concerns, or sarcastic thoughts :)


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